The Divine (An Alec Lightwood love story)
by ZombieSpaceKittie
Summary: Johanna is what they call a Divine, a vessel to the angel Ithuriel. For 12yrs she has been hidden away with a pack of werewolves, until Alec Lightwood shows up bloodied and dying. Bringing forth her angelic counterpart she inevitably weakens herself to save him causing her health to decline rapidly. It eventually becomes a race to save she and the angel's lives. Will they succeed?
1. Chapter 1

**Hi everyone! So I just got done re-reading the Mortal Instrument series since the new show was coming out and what not, and I've wanted to write a fic for a while but never got around to it, so…here it is lol. Also, this is an Alec/FOC/Magnus fanfiction, I know Alec is gay, blah blah blah, I adore Malec, but it's always fun to mix things up a bit, cause a little chaos, you know stuff like that ;) Anyways, enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Alec or any other characters from the mortal instrument series!**

The sky had begun to turn a dark omniscient grey, spreading darkness through the trees. Johanna sat patiently on an old rotted log, drawing circles in the dirt with a stick, as she let at a bored sigh. She hated when the boys would run, mostly because the old family house surrounded by forest for miles was ten times as creepy when you were there alone. Of course some would argue that being inside the creepy forest at night alone would be a tad bit more intimidating, especially with three werewolves running about, but it always gave her comfort knowing they were around.

"Really Jo?" A familiar voice rang out, causing Johanna to jump slightly, snapping the stick she had wielded in her hand.

"Emmanuel will kill you if he finds you out here alone like this," Johanna turned her head slightly, catching a glimpse of the familiar boy emerging from the tree line shoving his shirt down over his toned chest. Werewolves. She thought, averting her gaze.

"Hello to you too Sammy." She grinned wryly. "How was your run?"

Samuel rolled is chocolate eyes, as he threw himself down on the log beside her.

"Don't try to change the subject, you know he doesn't like you out here alone while we're running, anything could happen."

"But I'm not alone," she sighed. "I'm never alone."

Samuel ruffled her dark locks, "Just because you have some weird angel guy in your head, doesn't mean you can just do whatever you want."

" _ **I am not some 'weird angel guy' I am Ithuriel, servant of the Lord and archangel. I am also not in your head, but part of your soul. I am part of you, and you part of I."**_

Johanna rolled her eyes.

"Did you have to get him started?" She muttered, ignoring the angel's words.

"Well, if you think that's bad, you probably shouldn't stick around for Emmanuel to find you out here," Samuel stood up, dusting the dirt off his jeans, and held out a hand.

"Now come on, let's go back inside."

Johanna huffed and reluctantly took the young wolf's hand.

"Fine," she said. "I'll race you."

"Why do you always think you can beat me?" Samuel grinned, pushing his chestnut hair from his face. Johanna took a moment to admire the boy who she had grown up with, the boy who had found her, shivering, small form, lost and frightened in the woods when she was only five years old. But she wasn't that frightened little girl anymore, and Samuel was far from that little boy now. He stood almost a mountain taller than her, broad shoulders, long, slender body, but still somehow muscular. His chestnut hair was always tousled and windblown, like he never combed it, which knowing Samuel, he probably didn't, and yet somehow, he still made it work for him.

"Because," Johanna smirked. "You can't win if you're in the dirt!" At that, Johanna kicked Samuel's legs from underneath him, sending him onto his back.

"Catch you later loser!" She shouted, taking off into the darkness.

"Cheater." Samuel grumbled as he dusted himself off. "But that still won't help you!"

* * *

Johanna slowly dumped the freshly chopped carrots into the large iron pot. It was the last ingredient needed for her famous beef stew to be completed. Emmanuel and Oliver would be back from their run soon, and since the deer had been sparse this year, she knew they would have worked up quite an appetite.

"Something smells divine!" Samuel said sniffing the air hungrily, as he ran a towel over his sopping wet head, and plopped onto the kitchen counter.

"Well I am heavenly." Johanna smirked, as she stirred the stew contently.

" _ **That was quite blasphemes."**_ Ithuriel spoke.

"Oh hush you." She grumbled, taking a quick taste of her stew.

Samuel let out a small laugh as he threw the wet towel onto the counter beside him. To some people, Johanna's back and forth banter with the angel she shared a body with may have seemed a bit strange, but to Samuel, it's what made Jo, well, Jo. Since finding her in the woods all those years ago, cold, crying, and confused, he somehow knew she was special. Emmanuel knew that too, that's why he had decided to raise her as one of his own, which was an act greatly looked down upon amongst the downworlders, especially were wolves. But Emmanuel felt connected to the girl, he knew something was special about her, and when she was strong enough to talk, Ithuriel showed himself, spoke from the girl's body, telling Emmanuel everything, that the girl was the daughter of Valentine, a very evil and sadistic shadowhunter, who had trapped Ithuriel for many years. Johanna, being the curious girl that she was, had found him locked away and in pain, she had wept for him, and wondered why something so beautiful could be locked away, so she set him free, but he was too weak to return to his heavenly place, so he bound himself to her, marking her as his vessel, connecting their souls as one, and in turn vowing to protect her from the monsters of the world, including her father.

"Earth to Samuel!" Johanna said, snapping her fingers around his face, and pulling him from his thoughts.

"Right, sorry, I was just thinking about how much food I'm about to consume." He grinned, averting his thoughts back to the delicious smell.

"Right…" She said suspiciously. "Well you better not touch it until Emmanuel gets here or he'll have your head!"

"I know I know, alpha eats first, you know I am a werewolf right, not you, I know the rules." Samuel grumbled playfully, patting the spot on the counter next to him for her to sit down.

"Yeah yeah yeah…" She muttered, following his direction and plopping down next to him.

"When do you think they'll be back?" She asked, laying her head onto his shoulder. "They've been out there quite a while."

"I'm sure they'll be back soon, especially once they catch this delicious scent."

"Stop trying to suck up, I'm not sneaking you a bite, not until Emmanuel gets back."

"Ugh." Samuel grumbled, "You're insatiable…"

"And you're an a-" The sound of approaching footsteps interrupted her.

"I think they're back," She murmured, jumping from the countertop and cautiously making her way to the door.

"Johanna wait…" Samuel snapped, grabbing her by the arm and shoving her behind him protectively. "I smell blood."

"Blood?!" Johanna croaked hoarsely as panic began to set in.

"Is it Oliver or Emmanuel?" She questioned.

"Neither." He responded dryly. "It's Nephilim."

Before Johanna had time to respond Emmanuel and Oliver burst through the door carrying a strange dark haired boy covered in blood, around their shoulders. Johanna let out a gasp as the two men struggled to keep the boy up.

"Samuel, help Oliver get him downstairs quick, he's lost a lot of blood, he doesn't have a lot of time." Emmanuel's deep authoritative voice rang out. Samuel nodded, taking the boy by the arm, and quickly following his alpha's order.

Suddenly another boy emerged from behind the door, clad in black leather from head to toe. The only color on him was his bright, golden hair that was tousled and stained with blood. His deep blue eyes were full of fear and panic as they swept the room frantically. Johanna felt instantly bad for him, the other dark haired boy had to be his friend, but what were they doing out here, deep in the woods and on known werewolf territory at that. Samuel had said the blood he smelt was Nephilim blood, so they were shadowhunters, just like her. She had never met another shadowhunter before, not that she really had any right to be called one, she bore no runes, followed no Clave regulations, hunted no demons, instead she hung out with a pack of werewolves, lived with them, trained with them, followed their rules. She briefly wondered what the so called Clave would think of her, if they'd actually ever accept her, if she did ever decide to follow her heritage.

" _ **They would accept you, I would make sure of that."**_ Ithuriel spoke reassuringly.

Thanks. She replied silently.

It was true, the archangel did know exactly how to get on every nerve in her body, but he did care for her, and she him. In some odd way, they had ended up saving each other from the man that was her father. She often wondered what her life would have been like if she would have never discovered Ithuriel. What her father would have made her into, what other tortures her brother could have conjured up for her. Her brother loved dearly to torture her, and in some ways, she had feared him much more than her father.

 _ **Now is not the time to think of such things, the boy needs our help.**_

Johanna nodded her head in affirmation, and shook herself out of her trance.

"Where are they taking him?" The boy questioned.

"To the infirmary downstairs." Emmanuel answered. "Right now I need your help with a few things…What's your name?" Emmanuel asked, rummaging through the cabinets and tossing a few pots into the boy's arms.

"Jace." He replied "Jace Wayland."

"Well Jace, I need you to fill those up with warm water."

Jace nodded his head and quickly made his way to the sink taking a second glance at Johanna, finally noticing her presence.

"You're not a werewolf." He said half to himself. "She's not a werewolf."

"No," Emmanuel answered nonchalantly. "She's not. Johanna, can you please go assist Oliver and Samuel. I'll be down shortly."

"Yeah." She muttered, as she ran down the basement stairs to the makeshift infirmary. Oliver and Samuel had the boy laid out onto the metal surgical table they used to patch up themselves up from any injuries.

"What happened?" She asked, slowly making her way to stand by her brother's side.

"Hellhounds." Oliver answered dryly, as he began to rip the boys tattered and bloody shirt open, revealing large, gaping, wounds along his chest and abdomen. Johanna gasped at the sight, also noticing the many runes covering almost every inch of his torso, neck, and arms. Was this what it looked like to be shadowhunter? She thought to herself, taking a moment to admire how elegant and ornate the strange symbols seemed.

"Shit." Oliver grumbled, running his hands through his dark hair, pulling Johanna from her trance. "This is bad."

"I don't think I'll be able to stop the bleeding." Samuel added as he pressed his hands down onto the boy's wounds.

"You have to try, please." The other boy she now knew as Jace pleaded as he made his way down the steps along with Emmanuel, and carefully sat the pots down onto the counter next to them.

"We will." Emmanuel said gently, putting a comforting hand onto the boys shoulder.

"Dad, I don't think some warm water and bandages are going to help this, the wounds are deep, it won't be enough to stop the bleeding." Oliver added.

"I can help him." Johanna blurted out, not realizing what she had just said.

"No Johanna." Emmanuel said sternly.

"But he'll die!" She retorted, knowing that Ithuriel's powers were more than enough to save the boy.

"No Johanna, you know what it does to you!" Samuel retorted.

"Please, if she can do something to help, please let her, please don't let him die!" Jace pleaded.

"I can't protect you if they know, if the Clave knows!" Emmanuel growled.

"The Clave will never know, please, you have my word, whatever it is she can do, they will never hear a word from me!" Jace pleaded again. "Please, just save him."

That was all Johanna had to hear, she didn't care what the boys had to say about it, if she didn't save this boy he would die, and if there was one thing Johanna knew how to do, it was saving people. With Ithuriel by her side, she had done it many of times, and she was determined to do it now. She slowly walked up to the limp boy on the table, she wondered what his name was, what he was like. She knew he was loved, at least by Jace, the way he pleaded, tears and fear pooling in his eyes that he cared deeply for him.

" _ **It will weaken you, more than usual."**_ Ithuriel warned. " _ **But he is Nephilim, we must protect him."**_

Johanna nodded in affirmation. She knew what must be done. Gently she pushed the boys charcoal hair from his forehead. Fever had begun to set in, and he was sweating profusely. His face had paled, leaving only dark circles around his eyes. Even looking the way he did now, Johanna could tell the boy was handsome, again making her wonder what he must be like when he wasn't dying. Johanna shook the thoughts from her head and placed a careful hand onto his abdomen.

"Johanna." She heard one last pleading call from her adopted brother, Oliver, but she ignored it, and instead closed her eyes, taking in a sharp breathe as she knew what was about to come.

Ithuriel's power surged through her body, as his soul began to take over. She felt her consciousness slipping, felt herself being pushed to the back of her mind as Ithuriel's consciousness pushed itself forward. When her eyes opened she was no longer Johanna, but Ithuriel, his eyes bright gold that illuminated the room. Energy surged around him, causing Jace to gasp.

"What the hell is she?" He muttered hoarsely.

"Not what but who." Ithuriel's angelic voice rang out. "I am Ithuriel, servant of the Lord and archangel. Johanna and I are one, she is my vessel, I am her protector."

"I…I've never seen an angel before, I thought they didn't exist…" Jace mumbled in disbelief.

Ithuriel, ignoring his words, set his sights on the boy in front of him.

"Your friend-"

"Alec." Jace added.

"Alec. I can sense he is a true Nephilim, pure at heart and intention."

"He is." Jace agreed. "One of the best. Please, please save him."

At that, Ithuriel planted both his hands firmly onto Alec's wounds, his energy began to burn brighter as he forced his healing power onto the dying boy. Alec's began to glow with the same angelic energy as it coursed through his body, healing every wound from head to toe. Successful, Ithuriel gently removed his hands, wiping the blood absentmindedly onto the legs of Johanna's jeans.

"It is done." Ithuriel spoke. "But he will be weak for a while, my power can be too much on the human body, especially Johanna's." He said, turning to Emmanuel. "She will need to be looked after as well." Emmanuel nodded in confirmation, already knowing the drill.

"Keep them safe for as long as needed," Ithuriel added. "They are children of the Nephilim, they are of my blood."

The wolves nodded, they never really knew what to say to the angel, he was always so intimidating when he showed his face that they never could imagine disobeying him, even Emmanuel, he had seen what the angel was capable of. At that the angel closed his eyes, pushing his consciousness back into the depths of Johanna's mind, but as usual, Ithuriel's power was too much for Johanna's body to handle, causing her to collapse into unconsciousness onto the basement floor.

 **Okay so there's the first chapter! Let me know if you guys like it and if I should continue it! I know it's a little different but that's what I'm hoping will make it so great! Also, if you guys have any questions, or even suggestions, let me know! I'm always open to them! Thanks again for the read!**


	2. Chapter 2

Johanna groaned as she regained consciousness. Her body felt as if she had been flung against a brick wall multiple times, but she was use to this. Every time Ithuriel took over, it seemed she grew weaker and weaker. Ithuriel explained that even in the weakened state that he was, it was difficult for even a Nephilim body to contain such power. However, this time felt much different. Johanna suddenly felt ill, suddenly realizing what was about to happen, she heaved herself over the side of the infirmary bed just in time.

"That was gross." The now recognizable voice rang.

Johanna looked up to see Jace, seated in a wooden chair at the end of the boy named Alec's bed. Ignoring the boys comment she wiped her mouth, only for her hand to come back a scarlet red. Johanna stared down intensely at the smeared blood.

"Is that blood?" Jace observed, changing his tone of voice to concern.

"Th…This has never happened before." She murmured, mostly to Ithuriel. But there was no answer. He must be resting, she thought to herself. It usually takes quite a toll on him as well.

"Do you need me to get one of the others?" Jace asked, concern still evident in his voice.

"NO!" She all but yelled. "No, please don't do that. They don't need to know."

It really does a number on you, doesn't it?" He asked.

"Yeah. This time more than usual."

Jace's eyes fluttered to the now sleeping Alec, relief evident in his eyes as he watched over his friend.  
"Thank you." He whispered. Johanna suddenly realized he seemed to be holding back tears.

"You really care for him." Johanna pointed out, as she laid her head back onto her pillow.

"He's my Parabatai."

"Parabatai?" Johanna questioned.

"Yes, we are brothers, bound together by an oath to protect and care for one another. Something I failed to do today." Jace replied solemnly. "If it wasn't for you, I would have failed my oath to my Parabatai, so thank you."

Johanna gave him a nod.

"Just curious though," He spoke up again. "How-"

"Did I come about sharing a body with an archangel?"

"Yea…" He confirmed.

"Long story, but let's just say, we saved one another from a bad situation, and ever since, Emmanuel has raised me as his own."

"Interesting." Jace noted, nodding his head. "But you are a shadowhunter?"

"Well," She answered, resting her arm over her throbbing head. "Depends on what you call a shadowhunter. My parents were, yes, but I was raised by a pack of werewolves, so their way is the only thing I know."

"Ugh." Alec grumbled from his bed. "What happened?"

Jace quickly jumped from his place in the chair, and was at his Parabatai's side in an instant.

"Alec?" He murmured breathlessly. "You awake?"

"Of course I'm awake." Alec said dryly. "I just asked what happened didn't I?"

Alec's gaze fluttered to where Johanna lay, not far from his own bed. Revealing to her his piercing blue eyes, that seemed to carry an intensity she had never quite seen before.

"Who is she?" He questioned flatly.

"She, my friend," Jace smiled, the first smile Johanna had seen from him the whole time he had been here, as he clasped his hand onto his friend's shoulder. "Is the angel that saved your ass."

"I'm sorry, the what?"

"It's a long story." Jace and Johanna answered in unison.

Johanna hobbled slowly to the stove to heat up the now cold stew, while the others sat near the fire place, speaking to Jace, and the now walking Alec.

"Johanna," Oliver called as he jogged up beside her. "You really shouldn't be doing this, you need to rest, let me do it."

"It's fine." She reassured him, snatching the wooden ladle from his hand. "Besides, I need to walk around a bit, it helps ease the stiffness."

"Whatever you say." He sighed, kissing her gently on top of her long, dark hair. "You're too stubborn to listen to me anyways."

Johanna let out a low giggle as she scooped a spoonful of stew into a bowl.

"Come on everyone." She announced. "The food is done, and I'm sure you are all starving. We can discuss everything over dinner."

Without a word of rebuttal, the wolves were to their spots at the table in an instant, with Alec and Jace not far behind. One by one she placed a bowl in front of the group of men, and took her seat near the head of the table next to Emmanuel, sitting right across from the two shadowhunters.

Emmanuel took his much awaited first bite, giving the others the go ahead to follow suite.

"Holy crap this is delicious!" Jace grumbled in disbelief, shoveling another spoonful of stew into his mouth.

"You think we should trade her in for Isabelle back at the Institute?" Jace nudged Alec playfully. Alec sat silently, his gaze falling on Johanna once again in suspense, something that he had been doing, since he had heard of what she was.

"The institute?" Johanna questioned as she downed her own spoonful of stew.

"So," Emmanuel interrupted. "The much anticipated question is, why were two shadowhunters, and a whole pack of hellhounds, running around on werewolf territory?"

"It wasn't _just_ hellhounds." Alec finally spoke in his usual dry and uninterested tone, while Jace finished off the last bit of his stew. "There was a Greater Demon."

"Greater demon?!" Samuel spoke up.

"You know," Alec rolled his eyes sarcastically. "Really big, dangerous, has a mind of its own, usually can control lesser-"

"I know what a Greater demon is." Samuel growled. "But what the hell was it doing out there?"

"Not sure," Jace spoke. "We had been tracking it for some time now. It took us almost a week to finally track it back here, that's when we were ambushed by the hellhounds, with no greater demon to be found."

"If a Greater demon had hellhounds…" Oliver started, worry flashing in his forest green eyes.

"It had to be tracking something." Emmanuel finished, the same worried look washing over his face.

Johanna looked up from her bowl, realizing everyone's gaze had fallen fearfully onto her.

"What?" She asked quizzically. "Do I have something in my teeth?"

"Johanna." Emmanuel spoke, his breathing becoming increasingly heavier. "Do you think…"

"What?" She scoffed. "That he found me?"

"That who found you?" Jace questioned intensely.

"My father." Johanna finally spoke acidly. "Valentine."

 **Sorry this chapter was a bit short, but I'm trying to spit these first few chapters out as fast as possible, so you have some idea about where the story is going!**


	3. Chapter 3

"I'm sorry?" Jace questioned. "What was that?"

Johanna let out a long sigh. "Valentine Morgenstern. He's my father. Remember that 'bad situation' I told you Ithuriel and I escaped from? Well, that was him. I was five when I discovered him, locked away and near death in some sort of torture chamber of my father's, and when we were bound together, Ithuriel used a large amount of his power to teleport us as far away from him as he could. That's when Emmanuel found us."

"I'm sorry." Alec interrupted. "But I'm finding this very hard to believe. Not only have I never heard of any sort of angelic possession of the Nephilim, but I've also never heard about another Morgenstern daughter. If what you say is true, then how have we never heard of you?"

Alec glared at Johanna intently, his piercing blue eyes causing a shiver to ripple through her body. She hadn't done anything wrong, but somehow Alec seemed like the sort of guy that could make you feel guilty about anything, even if you had nothing to feel guilty about. Johanna realized she didn't like that quite much, and crossed her arms defensively.

"You ungrateful bastard." Samuel growled, slamming his fist down onto the table. "Johanna almost kills herself saving your ass, and you have the audacity to sit here and call her a liar?"

"Samuel!" Emmanuel's deep authoritative voice rang out. "That's enough!"

"Well," Alec said sardonically. "If she's telling the truth, why doesn't 'Ithuriel' show himself?"

"It doesn't work like that." Johanna sighed. "Besides, I haven't heard anything from him since I woke up, you know, after saving your life."

"She's telling the truth Alec, at least about the angel part. I saw it myself." Jace added.  
"Oh thanks." Johanna rolled her eyes.

"She even threw up blood afterwards when she woke up, I saw how badly it affects her Alec I mean come on, you were half torn apart, now you don't even have a scar, how else would that be possible?"

"She did what?" Emmanuel said averting his gaze worriedly to Johanna once again.

"Thanks, Jace…" She hissed through clenched teeth.

"How could you not tell me this?"

Before Johanna could reply a terrible screeching sound rang off painfully through her skull, sending her tumbling to the ground, screaming out in pain.

"What's happening?" Alec gasped, as the werewolves rushed to Johanna's side.

"I don't know." Jace answered, looking on at the now convulsing girl in disbelief.

"Johanna!" Samuel yelled, kneeling over her.

"Don't touch her Samuel!" Emmanuel warned the youngest wolf.

"She's going to hurt herself!" Samuel retorted as he grabbed his best friends head, disobeying his alpha's order. As soon as the contact was made, Johanna's eyes opened instantly, pouring the familiar, bright, glowing light into the room. Letting out an unearthly screech, Johanna's body burst into electrifying energy, consuming Samuel in the process.

Samuel let out a painful cry as the energy consumed his body, stumbling backwards as the sound of his bones snapping, filled the room, a sign that he was involuntarily shifting into his werewolf form. Samuel let out a pain filled howl.

"Oliver!" Emmanuel snapped at his son, who was standing paralyzed in disbelief. "Get Samuel into the woods now!" Snapping him from his trance, Oliver obeyed his father's command, and grabbed the now shifting Samuel, dragging him as fast as possible out the door.

"What the hell's happening!?" Alec demanded frantically.

"I don't know." Emmanuel replied solemnly, as he watched the girl he called his daughter in horror. "This has never happened before."

"That's what she said earlier about the blood." Jace added somberly. "Could the angel be weakening her?"

"Truthfully, it has been for quite some time, every time Ithuriel uses his powers, it takes quite a toll on both of them. But they are both very stubborn, and when someone needs help, they risk the consequences.

Alec hung his head, regret burning through his insides as he realized the girl was telling the truth, even risking her own life to save his, a rude, untrusting boy, who she didn't even know.

"What can we do to help?" Alec croaked out, as Johanna's body finally stopped convulsing, leaving her motionless on the floor.

"Help me get her to the couch." Emmanuel responded, grabbing his daughter's arms.

Alec grabbed her legs and helped Emmanuel guide her to the couch, while Jace moved around some pillows. Gently laying her down, Emmanuel then excused himself to go find her a blanket.

"This is insane." Alec exhaled, plopping down onto the plump recliner and roughly running his hands through his course black hair.

"You'll get no argument from me on that." Jace replied, taking a seat as well. "Do you think she's really Valentine's daughter?"

"After seeing that," Alec motioned towards a now unconscious Johanna. "Anything could be possible."

"We should call Clary and Isabelle soon." Jace said. "Let them know we are okay."

"I suggest keeping all of this," Alec motioned around the room, "to ourselves for now."

"Again, no argument here." Jace grinned. "I'm going to step outside, see if I can get any cell reception."

Alec nodded his head as his Parabatai walked out of the door, leaving him alone with the odd, unconscious, angel girl. Emmanuel then walked back down the main stairwell with a large cloth blanket, gently laying it on top of Johanna.

"Would you mind looking after her while I go check on my son and nephew?" Emmanuel finally spoke, not taking his eyes off of his daughter.

Alec panicked for a moment. What if she woke up all crazy again? What if she woke up in general? He wasn't the best conversationalist, and had even worse bed side manners.

"Um…sure." He finally replied, earning a grateful nod from the alpha, before turning and disappearing behind the door, leaving Alec alone with the girl once again.

Alec took a moment to study the girl's features. Her hair was shoulder length and wavy. It was dark, only a shade or two lighter than his own. Her skin was pale, but not the sickly type, it was a nice paleness, that showed the natural rosy blush of her cheeks quite well. He had noticed earlier that her eyes were a deep blue, eyes that were very soulful, which he assumed was due partly to the fact that she had two.

The girl being some angelic vessel was still a very hard concept for him to grasp, after all, he was a realist, who had to see things through his own eyes to believe them, and in this case, he had. So many questions ran through his head.

"You're staring." Johanna spoke, startling him so much he almost jumped out of the recliner he was sitting in.

"I-I'm gay." He blurted out, mentally kicking himself repeatedly in the face after realizing what he had just said.

"Glad you got that off your chest?" She asked mockingly. Grumbling afterwards as she attempted to sit up.

"You shouldn't do that." Alec mumbled to his feet, his face burning brighter than heavenly fire. What was wrong with him? He thought to himself.

"Well, as I'm sure you'll soon find, out, I tend to do things on my own agenda." She replied, defiantly propping herself up onto her pillows.

"Maybe you are a Morgenstern after all." Alec grumbled to himself, referring to the fiery haired girl, Jace was most likely on the phone with right now.

"Excuse me?" Johanna asked, cocking her head to one side.

"Nothing." Alec grumbled.

"So, Mr. 'Gay', tell me what poor unfortunate soul you have within your clutches?"

Alec narrowed his eyes at her comment, but decided to answer it anyways.

"His name is Magnus." Saying his name brought a small smile onto his face.

"Wow," Johanna grinned. "It can smile?"

"Shut up." Alec retorted.

"I'm sorry," Johanna apologized. "But you really should try to do it more often, it suites you."

"Thanks. I guess." Alec replied dryly.

"I mean it actually makes you look somewhat normal." Johanna smirked.

Alec rolled his eyes.

"You're unbelievable." He grumbled. "How do they even put up with you around here?"

"Making friends I see Alec." Jace grinned as he appeared from behind the door.

"The best." Alec replied sarcastically, earning a deadly glare from the girl on the couch beside him.


	4. Chapter 4

Johanna let out a sigh as she listened to the back and forth banter of the two shadowhunters while she waited for the boys to return.

"We need to figure out what is going on with all of this," Alec gestured towards Johanna.

"Quickly, so we can get back to the institute, there's no telling what sort of trouble Clary's already conjured up for herself and everyone else."

"Don't be an ass Alec, I'm sure everything is fine, besides, Izzy is more than capable of handling it." Jace sighed at his friend.

"Izzy? I'm sorry but are we even talking about the same girl here? Because if we are talking about Isabelle Lightwood, then we have a big problem." Alec retorted dryly.

"Do you guys ever shut up?" Johanna grumbled, forcefully pushing her face into her pillow.  
"And by 'you guys' I'm sure you mean Alec right?" Jace smirked playfully.

"Whatever Jace, you just wait, by the time we get back, the institute will have been burnt to the ground and our reputations as shadowhunters down with it."

"Jeesh Alec," Jace stared in disbelief. "What exactly has Clary done to you?"

"Do you really want to get started on that?" Alec rolled his eyes.

"Yeah I do."

"She's reckless, careless, doesn't follow orders…" Alec drawled on.

"What exactly does that have to do with you Alec?" Jace scoffed.

"Because I'm the oldest Jace, all of you are my responsibility! And ever since she got here none of you want to follow orders! I'm actually quite certain we've broken practically every Clave law there is to break."

"I think that's a bit of an exaggeration Alec." Jace huffed.

"Wow." Johanna finally spoke up, "You must really hate my sister, no wonder you've been so warm and snuggly to me."

The two shadowhunters looked at her intensely. How did she know who Clary was?

"You know she's your sister?" Alec questioned suspiciously.

"Well yeah, I mean I've never met the girl, but word tends to gets around here in the 'downworld' as you like to call it." Johanna answered casually.

"So you know your mother, Jocelyn, is missing, kidnapped by Valentine?" Jace asked.

"Sure," She replied coolly. "I heard but, I have no memories of her, which is weird I guess, but, the only person I can remember is him. Valentine." And your brother. She thought to herself. But she didn't want to bring him up, having to remember her father's face was enough, she didn't want to remember his too.

"You never wondered about them? Wondered what it would be like to have your family?" Jace asked sadly.

"Honestly, until I heard of Clary's surface to the shadow world, I never even thought I had a mother or sister. Emmanuel and the boys are all I've ever known, I've had a good life here with them, and I've never once considered changing that."

Before Jace had time to reply, Oliver and a very exhausted looking Samuel entered through the door.

"Samuel!" Johanna cried in relief, jumping from her spot on the couch and enveloping her friend into a big hug.

"Here, let me help you to the couch." She said, allowing him to put some of his weight onto her shoulders as she led him to the couch, and gently placed him down.

"You okay?" He croaked out, the exhaustion evident in his voice.

"I should be asking you the same." She smiled warmly, placing a hand onto his paled cheek. "Where is dad?" She observed.

"I don't know." Oliver answered. "I thought he was here watching over you."

"He left to check on you." Alec added.

Suddenly a bone chilling howl sounded from outside the house, causing everyone to jump to their feet.

"What was that?" Jace asked fearfully.

"That was Emmanuel." Samuel answered, frantically jumping up from his spot on the couch. "Something's wrong."

Without a second thought the boys and Johanna raced to the door.

"No Johanna." Oliver held out a hand. "You stay here, you're still too weak."

"Like hell I am!" She growled, shoving his hand out of the way, and pushing herself past them through the door.

"He's sounds like he's in the west corner of the property!" Samuel called out, already making his way through the dense trees. Without another argument, the group made their way through the trees, the two shadowhunters wielding their weapons high, Jace with his seraph blade, and Alec with his bow, an arrow already notched.

"Dad!" Johanna called out frantically as another eerie howl rang out through the forest, letting them know they were very close.

"There!" Yelled Samuel, stopping them all in their tracks looking on at the scene before them in horror.

"By the angel." Alec hitched in a quick breath through clenched teeth.

The group stood paralyzed as they took in the sight of it. Its body was fleshy and thin, almost like elastic pulled over bone. Its face was empty and haunting, with no eyes or any other distinguishing human features. Its long bony hand was thrust into Emmanuel's chest, his body transforming painfully around it, back to his human form.

"That's it." Jace clenched his jaw firmly. "That's the greater demon we were tracking."

Suddenly sensing their presence the greater demon's head snapped eerily into their direction, its empty face falling hauntingly onto Johanna as it slung Emmanuel's now limp body onto the ground.

"NO!" She screamed out, watching the man she called her father's body hit the ground with a sickening crunch.

Without warning the greater demon made its way swiftly towards her, causing Alec to shoot an arrow in its direction, meeting its mark right into its chest. The greater demon stopped for a moment looking down at the arrow protruding from its chest and wrapped its long ghastly fingers around it, ripping it from its place as it let out a deep, throaty chuckle.

"You bastard!" Oliver yelled, charging at the demon, only to be swatted away like a fly, sending him face first into the dirt. The sight caused Samuel to take his turn, only to meet the same fate. Rage bubbled up in Johanna's chest, spilling hot angry tears down her cheeks.

"Give me that." She growled at Jace, gesturing towards his seraph blade.

"Do you even know how to use it?" He asked concerned.

"I'm half angel, I think I'll manage." She retorted as she snatched the angelic blade from his hands.

It reacted instanty to her touch, immediately pulsing a bright blue. Johanna closed her eyes, taking in a deep breath. Where are you Ithuriel? She questioned, but there was no response.

"You are me, I am you." She mumbled, gripping the blade tighter in her grasp. "You are me, I am you. You are me, I am you."

As if sensing the angel's presence within her, the seraph blade sent a wave of energy throughout her body. Johanna could feel the power awaken within her, could feel it coursing through her arm into the blade. Suddenly, the blade combust into a golden force of energy, no longer its usual bright blue.

This is it. She thought to herself. I don't know where you are Ithuriel, but by the angel please watch over me.

Glancing at the two shadowhunters staring at her in disbelief one last time, she took a deep breath and flung herself at the demon, slashing a deep gash into its arm.

It let out a howl and attempted to claw back at her, but Johanna was too quick, and ducted out of the way just in time.

Alec released another arrow, distracting the demon long enough for Johanna to plunge the blade right into the demons chest. Johanna fell backwards as the demon let out a loud unearthly screech, clawing at its chest frantically, but it was too late, Johanna had done the damage, and watched on as the greater demon exploded into a cloud of smoldering ash.

"Dad!" She yelled, pulling herself up off of the ground and made her way to her father's side, where Oliver and Samuel had already arrived.

The wound was deep, deeper than she'd ever seen, and there was blood, so much blood. Johanna fell to her knees at Emmanuel's side grasping his outstretched hand.

"Johanna." He whispered hoarsely. "Know that I love you, so very much. Since the day I first set eyes on you, I knew you were meant to be my daughter."

"Dad," She cried, as tears clouded her vision. "I love you too, so, so much."

Emmanuel smiled a very tired smile, and turned his gaze to his nephew who was hovered over him as well, next to Oliver and Johanna.

"Samuel," He croaked. "You must call your father, get him back here, he will need to help Oliver." Samuel nodded in affirmation at his dying alpha's command.

"Help me with what dad?" Oliver sniffled, holding back the tears that were welling up in his eyes.

"You, you are alpha now."

"No!" Oliver snapped. "No! You are alpha, you are not going anywhere, stop talking like that!"

Emmanuel smiled proudly at his son. "Know that I am proud of you son, you will be a great alpha. Johanna." He said, turning his attention back to the weeping girl.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you, I tried, I really did."

"You did!" She whimpered. "I have!"

"The Nephilim, they are your only hope now. Jace, Alec." He called to the two shadowhunters, standing idly by as they watched the scene sadly. Hearing Emmanuel's calls, they stepped forward solemnly.

"Please." Emmanuel coughed. "Please promise me you will protect my daughter, see to it Valentine never harms her again."

"You have our word." Jace replied, as Alec gave a silent nod.

"No." Johanna growled. "I will not let you die." She placed her hands onto the gaping wound in her father's chest, closing her eyes tightly.

"Ithuriel!" She yelled to the dormant angel. "Ithuriel please where are you!"

Jace laid a hand onto her shoulder, but she shrugged it off, pushing her hands harder into the wound as she tried to conjure up just a morsel of the angel's powers in order to save her father, and let out a frustrated scream when it didn't work.

"Johanna." Oliver pleaded, tears now streaming down his and Samuel's faces. But she ignored him, and instead began pushing on her father's wounds once again.

A hand grabbed her shoulder, and pulled her upward forcefully.

"Stop it." Alec said firmly. "He's gone."

"No!" She bellowed, turning her gaze back to her father, just in time to catch his body dissolve into a smoke of ash.

"No!" She yelled once again, diving back down to the spot where her father's body once lay. But Alec grabbed her arm tightly, holding her firmly in place.

"Let me go!" She hissed, pushing him away from her, and beating her fists into his chest.

Alec stood still, standing diligently while she took her rage out onto him.

"No!" She cried once again, hitting him on last time before crumbling into him. Johanna's tears ran freely now as she shoved her face into Alec's shirt.

Alec froze, not quite knowing what to do. It wasn't every day some girl he barely knew cried forcefully into his chest. Of course, he had consoled Isabelle countless times after fights with their mother or bad breakups, but this was much different. After much debate in his head, he wrapped his arms carefully around her comfortingly.

"What now?" Samuel asked, wiping his tear stained face with the back of his hand.

"You heard Dad." Oliver replied hoarsely, still staring at the spot where his father once lay. "We call in the rest of the pack."

"And then what?" He retorted.

"We have to regroup, get everyone together tell them the news, take time to mourn."

"We're just going to let whoever was behind this get away!" Samuel growled.

"We know who did this Samuel!" Oliver hissed. "And it's not our war to fight!"

"Like hell it isn't, he just killed your father!"

"That's enough Samuel." Oliver sighed.

"And what about Johanna?" He asked, ignoring Oliver's plea, as he pointed to the girl, still sobbing in Alec's awkward grasp.

"She'll come to the Institute." Jace replied. "We promised Emmanuel we'd protect her, and that's what we're going to do."

"Like hell!" Samuel snapped. "The safest place for her is here, with us, were she belongs."

"The safest place for her," Alec added coolly. "Is at the Institute, amongst her own people. That's where she belongs."

"If you think I'm going to let that happen, you're stupid shadowhunter." Samuel hissed venomously.

"That is enough Samuel!" Oliver snarled, grabbing the young wolf by the shirt and slamming him against a nearby tree. "We are following father's wishes and that's final!"

Finally able to calm herself, Johanna removed herself gently from Alec's grasp, turning to the quarreling werewolves.

"Whatever you say, _alpha._ " Samuel said bitterly, straightening himself once Oliver released him.

"They're right Samuel." Johanna spoke hoarsely, her throat still raspy from crying. "This isn't your fight, it's mine, the demon was looking for _me_ , it wanted me."

"Johanna." Samuel pleaded.

"I have to go Samuel, what Alec said was true, I belong there, with them, I'm a Nephilim. I have to go, to be whatever I was meant to be, so I can find my father, and rip him apart, piece by piece." She growled through clenched teeth.

"Then we need to go." Jace replied. "Soon, we have a lot of work to do."  
 **  
So there was Chapter 4 guys! Bum bum BUUUM! Why always so awkward Alec? Lol And poor Emmanuel! Gah why am I so heartless? Well, let me know if you guys are enjoying it! I would love to hear from you guys! Thanks so much again for all the reads and hearts! You guys are awesome! Until next time!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Wow guys! You all are so amazing! I took a bit of a break to be with family for the holidays, and come back to see so much love! Thank you guys! I know this chapter isn't much, but I hope it will hold you guys over until I finish the next one hopefully by tomorrow! Again, thank you guys so much for all of the reads and comments! You all are the best!**

Johanna looked down at her blood stained hands for the first time since they had made it back to the house. Jace had told her to get a few personal items and some clothes, so she had come into her room to do just that, but all she was able to do was stare at her hands as the once bright blood began to darken and crust onto her hands. Johanna forced herself to move forward grabbing a duffel bag from underneath her bed and beginning to throw various articles of clothing into it.

Johanna caught a glance at herself in her mirror as she walked past and stopped to take in the view. Her dark hair was tousled and in tangles all over her head, her face was a yellow, sickly pale color, not at all like the normal paleness that it usually was. Her lime green tank top was ripped down the front showing the small paw print tattoo she had gotten to show her loyalty and love for her werewolf family, the family she would soon be leaving, the father that she watched get murdered by a demon, a demon under the command of the man who created her but was no father. The anger bubbled in her stomach once again, and made her nauseous.

'I can't do this, not now.' She thought to herself, and pushed the thoughts out of her head. Johanna noticed her jeans next, there was blood all over them, probably Alec's, Emmanuel's and a mixture of her own to be truthful. Johanna let out a sigh. She probably looked like something out of a horror movie, changing would probably be a good idea if she wanted to make a good first impression at the institute.

She settled for another pair of jeans that clung to her figure, a black, silken, sleeveless top, and a pair of leather boots that came up just below her knees. After getting dressed she then threw her hair into a messy ponytail, let out a deep breath, and headed downstairs to say her farewells.

* * *

Johanna stood staring intensely at the large church doors. As soon as she walked through those doors her life would officially change for good. Was she ready? Would they accept her as a shadowhunter even though she was raised by werewolves?

"Did the werewolves not teach you how to open doors?" Alec's dry sarcastic voice rang out beside her. Johanna let out a sigh.

"Yes, I know how to open doors, thanks. I just…"

"They're going to accept you," Alec said, as if reading her thoughts. "Just like Jace and I accepted you."

Johanna let out a laugh.

"Oh right, because you were so accepting." She grinned. "Am I going to have to convulse around on the floor a little bit to earn their acceptance too?"

Jace made his way up the steps with Johanna's bag and placed a comforting hand onto her shoulder.

"The great thing about that is, if Alec Lightwood accepts you, you won't get much of an argument from anyone else."

Alec sent a glare in Jace's direction.

"Surprise, surprise, Alec's the difficult one." Johanna replied sarcastically.

"I'm going inside." Alec said, rolling his eyes, as he opened the large heavy door to the institute.

Here goes nothing. Thought Johanna.

"Alec, Jace!" A feminine voice rang out as soon as the elevator doors opened. A tall dark haired girl came running up the corridor to great them. Johanna was taken aback at how beautiful she was, and in all honesty, it intimidated her a bit, but Johanna was raised by werewolves, showing her intimidation was something that just wasn't possible for her.

The girl stopped as soon as she saw Johanna standing awkwardly between the two boys.

"Who is this?" She questioned curiously, as the trio stepped out of the elevator to meet her.

"This is Johanna." Jace replied. "She's going to be staying with us."

"A shadowhunter?" The girl who Johanna assumed was Alec's sister Isabelle, asked.

"Something like that." Johanna answered.

"What is your last name?" Isabelle asked suspiciously.

"I go by my adopted name, Antipov."

"Antipov? You mean like the northern werewolf pack?" Isabelle asked surprised.

"She was found by their alpha when she was a child, they took her in and raised her." Alec spoke uninterestedly.

"So you were raised by werewolves? Do you know who your real parents are?"

"Jeesh Izzy!" Jace interrupted. "What's with the third degree?"

"I'm sorry, it's just not every day we get a new shadowhunter, well I guess that's not true now." Isabelle smiled. "But if my brother and Jace agree about bringing you here, then it must be a good reason."

"The alpha's dead." Alec said grimly, remembering Emmanuel's brutal death.

"The greater demon we had been tracking, we followed it back there, it was being controlled by Valentine."

"Valentine?" Another voice came. The girl's fiery red hair was the first thing Johanna noticed, cascading beautifully around her shoulders as she walked up to stand in front of them.

"Johanna, this is Clary, Clary, this is Johanna, the new, new girl." Isabelle smiled.

Seeing the girl that was her sister for the first time made Johanna sick to her stomach. There were so many emotions flowing through her she didn't know which one to settle on. A part of her wanted to hate the girl for having the life that was taken away from her, for having the mother Johanna never had, the mother that abandoned her, left her with those monsters, but then again, if she hadn't she never would have met Ithuriel, or got to know the love of a real father and brother.

Johanna finally settled for indifferent, and gave Clary a nod, getting a small smile in return. A hand fell lightly onto her back, and Johanna was surprised to see that it was Alec, not Jace, sensing her distress, and attempting to comfort her, warranting a very confused and surprised look from the two girls in front of them, giving Johanna the impression that Alec wasn't quite the comforting type.

"If you guys are finished," Alec began. "We still have to bring her to see Hodge, but first I'll show you to your room." Alec said, turning his attention to Johanna, who gave a nod in agreement.

"I'll give Hodge the heads up." Jace replied, handing Alec Johanna's bag as he led Johanna down the corridor to the living quarters.

"When did Alec get so welcoming?" Clary asked, a tad bit jealous that Alec was so accepting of the new mysterious girl.

* * *

"She's been through a lot Clary. Her father was murdered violently right in front of her. It's something no one should have to witness, believe me, I know," Jace replied solemnly, remembering his own father's demise. "Even Alec knows that."

"This is where you will be staying." Alec said as he opened the door and gently sat Johanna's bag down. Johanna's gaze moved around the room, taking in her surroundings. It was spacious yet not too open. There was an attached bathroom, which was something she never had back home, instead she would have to fight the boys off for any type of bathroom time, so the thought of having her own made her a bit excited. The bed was neatly made up and looked very comfortable, and there was a desk near the window with a small lamp and chair.

"If you need anything, Jace's room is about two doors down to the right, and Isabelle's is at the end of the hall next to Clary's." Alec finally spoke.

"What about yours?" Johanna blurted out. Why had she just asked that?

Alec paused for a minute before replying. "I'm right across the hall."

"You're across the hall, as in directly in front of me? I didn't think you'd want me so close to you."

"I promised I'd protect you, so that's what I'm doing, don't get any ideas that we're friends or something, and don't bother me unless it's something important." Alec scolded. "Got it?"

Johanna fell silent. She didn't quite know why Alec's words had upset her so much, but they had. Maybe it was because she had thought they were becoming friends, after what he had said to Samuel about how she belonged here at the institute with them, but now it was clear, Alec was just keeping the promise to her father, and nothing more, which wasn't a bad thing, so why was it upsetting her?

Sensing Johanna's distress once again, Alec let out a long sigh. He didn't quite know why it bothered him so much that she was upset, or hurting, in fact he knew she was hurting, he could feel it somehow, even though she didn't show it, and it bothered him, more than he wanted to admit.

Alec argued with himself for a second before deciding to do something very out of character, and pulled a very surprised Johanna into a hug.

Johanna stood awkwardly in Alec's arms, feeling ten types of confused, and if she was being honest with herself, a bit frightened, who wouldn't be, the guy was very confusing.

"Don't mistake this as a sign of friendship or anything." Alec said dryly.

"Then why are you hugging me?" Johanna replied, still just as confused as she was ten seconds ago.

"Don't ask annoying questions," Alec answered. "And don't get my shirt wet again."

Johanna realized that Alec was trying to comfort her, like he had back in the forest, in his own weird way. She didn't want to admit it but Alec's odd way of comforting her actually made her feel better, and even though he didn't want to admit it, she bet he actually did see her as a friend, after all, she did save his life, that had to account for something in Alec Lightwood's mind?

Somehow, she had felt more connected to the two shadowhunters just in this small amount of time than she'd ever felt with anyone, but then again it could be accredited to the fact that they were all of the same blood, the werewolves were her family yes, and she loved them more than words could describe, but she could see now how much she belonged her, Jace and Alec had shown her that. They had accepted her, even promising to keep her safe from the very people they were supposed to be working under.

And Alec, pushing aside his callous and indifferent façades to show just a bit of comfort to her despite what he had said, just showed her even more what type of person he actually was.

"Thank you." She whispered, wrapping her arms around him.

"Please don't make this more awkward than it already is." Alec replied, garnering a small and content laugh from Johanna.


	6. Chapter 6

**You guys are the best! Thank you everyone who has read, liked, and commented! You all make my day a bit brighter, and I'm glad I get to do the same for you! 3**

Jace led Johanna down the long corridor to the library where Hodge apparently liked to spend his time. Johanna's stomach was in knots, meeting new people was never a common occurrence back home at the secluded werewolf estate. Of course going into town was almost the equivalence of that, but most of the town's people knew them anyway.

"We're here." Jace said, snapping Johanna out of her thoughts and back to the task at hand. Johanna stared at the large wooden door in front of her and took in a deep breath before gently turning the nob and stepping into the room cautiously.

Johanna's eyes widened as she took in the rows upon rows of books surrounding the whole room, she had never seen anything like it before. Johanna walked up to the large shelf and ran her hand lightly over the books that filled them.

"Hello." A voice came from behind her. Johanna spun around quickly, startled, and a bit embarrassed, to see an older man with greying dark hair, who she assumed was Hodge, staring back at her. When their eyes met, the color seemed to drain from Hodge's face, and the warm smile faltered, but was back in almost an instant.

"Um, hi." Johanna replied hesitantly, now feeling a bit off.

"Johanna is it?" Hodge smiled warmly. "Jace has told me all about you."

"Has he now?" She answered, cutting a quick glance in Jace's direction, earning a reassuring smile back from him.

"Yes," Hodge answered. "I'm terribly sorry to hear about your father, I can't imagine how that must feel."

"Thank you."

"In any case, you are welcome to stay here as long as you'd like, I assume Alec has already shown you to your room?" asked Hodge.

"Thank you, and yes, he has."

"Great! Well I will let Maryse and Robert know of your arrival, I'm sure they will be happy to have you as well."

Johanna gave Hodge one last nod before turning to exit the room.

"One last question." Hodge called out. "How did you know you were a Nephilim? Do you have any memory of your real parents?"

"No." Johanna lied, turning back around to face him. "I don't remember anything about my real parents, Emmanuel could sense what I was when he found me, so I've known for quite some time what I am."

"I'm very sorry to hear. Many shadowhunters lost their lives during the uprising, it is a very sad truth to our history." Hodge said somberly. "But at any rate, go, explore the institute a bit, get used to it, you'll find it is quite easy to get lost around here."

" _ **You make him nervous."**_

"Ithuriel!?" Johanna gasped a loud at the angel's words, earning a confused look from Hodge.

"Everything okay Johanna?" Hodge asked concerned. Johanna didn't answer. Instead, she darted out of the door and ran as fast as she could, trying to find a safe place to talk to the long absent angel.

"She uh, must have remembered something." Jace sputtered, before running out of the room after her.

"Ithuriel, you're okay." Johanna said with relief as she made her way into her room.

" _ **Yes, the Nephilim took quite a lot out of me, and you too I feel."**_

"I was beginning to worry." Johanna sighed. "Father, he's…"

" _ **I know child, I could sense his departure, but was unable to do anything. I'm sorry."**_

"Johanna!" Jace called, as he entered her room and shut the door behind him forcefully. "The angel, he's back?"

"Yes, he is, his strength has returned to him." Johanna replied. "Jace, thank you, for not saying anything to anyone about this, I know how hard it must be to keep secrets around here, especially from Clary."

"Why would it be hard for me to keep something from her?" Jace asked.

"Well, I see the way you two look at each other, I'm not blind." Johanna smirked.

Jace's face turned a deep red at hearing Johanna's words. It seemed a bit unnatural and out of place to Johanna, warranting a small chuckle from her.

"Just-just come on, I'm sure you're hungry, I'll see what I can find, oh, and do not for any reason, no matter how hungry you may be, do not accept any food from Isabelle Lightwood, I don't care if you're starving and on the brink of death, just, take my word for it." Jace said, opening the door and motioning for her to follow.

"Ok…" said Johanna confusedly as she followed in behind the blonde haired shadowhunter.

When they arrived in the kitchen, Isabelle and Clary were already there, Clary rummaging through the refrigerator to no avail as Isabelle stirred the contents of her large, steel pot contently.

"Remember what I told you." Jace leaned over and whispered into Johanna's ear.

"What was that Jace?" Isabelle questioned suspiciously.

"I said smells wonderful." Jace sputtered out, earning a deathly glare from the dark haired girl.

"Right." She said, still eyeing him viciously. "Johanna right?" She said, turning her glare into a large smile as she brought her attention to the nervous girl standing next to Jace.

"Uh, yeah." Johanna answered, returning the girl's smile.

"Well, I'm sure you are starving, sit down and I'll fix you a bowl."

"Oh, I um-I just-I" Johanna sputtered out, not knowing exactly what to say. She was in all honesty, terribly hungry, but Jace's very serious comment about Isabelle's cooking made Johanna very nervous.

"Here's an idea!" Jace interrupted, saving Johanna from her babbling. "Johanna actually loves cooking too! She's actually really really good, I mean that stew you made was incredible,"

"What's your point Jace?" Isabelle hissed.

"I _mean_ how about you guys get to know each other, and oh I don't know, give each other some pointers or whatever, I'm sure Johanna would love to show you how to make that awesome stew-"

Wow, thanks for the help Jace. Johanna thought to herself, as Isabelle's glare began to fall on her as well.

"I mean it's like a really old recipe handed down, it's nothing special." Johanna began, trying to salvage what little bit of acceptance Isabelle had left for her. "You just… follow the recipe."

"Well that sounds wonderful." Jace smiled nervously. "I'll just leave you guys too it then."

"Wait what?" Johanna questioned, not wanting to be left alone with a girl who Jace had just dug her grave with, and another girl who just so happened to be her long lost sister. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to find Alec. You stay here, get to know Isabelle and _Clary."_ Jace smiled, patting her on the head and making his way quickly out of the kitchen.

"Thanks." She grumbled to herself.

"So," Clary asked, causing Johanna to jump slightly. She turned around and made her way grudgingly to take a seat at the counter were Clary and now Isabelle was seated. "What was it like living with a bunch of werewolves?"

"It wasn't too bad. I grew up with them so what might have seemed odd to anyone else, just seemed normal to me." Johanna answered.

"Like what?" Isabelle added, as the two girls stared intently, awaiting her reply.

"Um, well, like how they're always hungry, or their weekly runs, sometimes twice a week, if it was a stressful one. Um, how alpha always takes the first bite, and all the other werewolf rules."

"That's incredible." Clary smiled.

"So how many did you live with?" Isabelle pried.

"Just three." Johanna replied. "My father who was the alpha, my brother, and my father's nephew, but sometimes other members of the pack would stop in from time to time."

"I'm sorry." Said Clary. "About your father, I know what it's like to get someone you love ripped away from you by Valentine."

Johanna instantly felt bad for Clary, she could see now how much Clary was hurting, how much she loved and missed her mother. Johanna couldn't hate her for that, couldn't hate either of them really. For all Johanna knew Valentine had ripped her right out of her mother's arms, which was likely, but even if it wasn't, and her mother, their mother, left her behind, she still couldn't hate her, or blame her really.

Johanna gave Clary a sad smile. "Hopefully we can return yours back to you."

"Johanna." Alec's voice rang from the door way. "Come on, we have work to do."

"Oh come on Alec, we were just getting to know her, give the girl a break why don't you? She just got here!" Isabelle complained.

"Johanna!" Alec called again, ignoring his sister's complaints.

Johanna gave the two girls an apologetic look before getting up from her spot at the counter.

"Hey," Isabelle whispered, gently placing her hand on top of Johanna's. "My brother can be a real pain in the behind sometimes, don't let him boss you around too much." She smiled.

Johanna smiled back and gave the girls a nod before falling in pace behind a very obviously frustrated Alec.

"Somebody's upset." Johanna mumbled, half to herself, which only caused Alec to pick up his pace some more.

"Hey!" Johanna yelled, speeding up to stay in stride with him. "What's your deal?"

"I don't have 'a deal'." Alec retorted dryly.

Johanna rolled her eyes at how stubbornly closed off he was.

"Fine, where are we going?"

"Here." He said, stopping in front of a large matted room. "It's the training area."

"You did see me kill that demon right? So you know I know how to fight."

"I didn't say you didn't. We're here to pick out a weapon for you." Alec walked to the furthest end of the wall, showing Johanna the multitude of weapons in the shadowhunter arsenal. Johanna followed behind him, taking in the beautifully crafted and unique weapons in front of her.

"Jace told me Ithuriel is back." Said Alec, watching Johanna carefully as she stared at the weapons in awe.

"Yeah, he returned to me earlier."

"Which I assume means his powers have as well?" Alec questioned.

"Yeah, for the most part I suppose. Why?"

"Well, I also saw how the seraph blade reacted to you when you killed that demon without the angel's presence, which means anything with heavenly fire would be a dead giveaway as to what you are."

"Then what do you suggest?"

Johanna's question caused a quick smile to form onto Alec's lips momentarily.

"Here." He said, pulling a white, beautifully crafted bow from the wall, and shoving it into Johanna's direction.

"A bow?" Johanna asked, turning it over in her hands.

"It isn't really a 'shadowhunter' weapon, which means no heavenly fire, it also keeps you at a safe distance."

"Right, except, I have no idea how to use one." Johanna sighed.

"That's why we're here." Alec sighed frustratingly.

"What?" Johanna scoffed. "You're going to teach me?"

"Yeah, got a problem with that?" Alec frowned.

"Well no, I just figured you would."

"I told you, I promised to protect you, so that's what I'm doing."

"But why?" Johanna questioned. "I mean he's dead, you don't have to keep a promise to a dead man."

Alec looked at her a bit surprised. "Shadowhunters always keep their promises."

"Ok." Johanna nodded, wanting to change the subject. "Where is Jace by the way? He said he was coming to find you."

Alec clenched his jaw and let at a sharp breath.

"He did." He mumbled angrily, turning the arrows over one by one, creating small runic markings with his stele.

"I take it, it didn't go so well?"

"No." Alec grumbled.

"Well…" Johanna said impatiently. "What happened?"

"You talk too much, you know that?" Alec grumbled once more.

"Oh no, no no no! You aren't going to turn this on me. I won't allow it. So, what happened?" Johanna huffed, placing her hands on her hips defiantly.

Alec rolled his eyes. "Jace is following up on a lead to Valentine, that's all there is to it."

"And you don't agree?"

"Of course I don't!" Alec growled, slamming the arrows down onto the small weapons table. "He's putting himself in unnecessary danger, all for Clary, every stupid thing he's done since she's gotten here has all been for her!"

"You sound a bit jealous." Johanna blurted, not really meaning to say it aloud.

Alec just sent her an impassive glare.

"What," Johanna smirked jokingly. "You have a thing for him or something?"

Alec averted his gaze from hers. His initial thought was to lash out at her, tell her it wasn't true and to shut up thinking such things, just like he had Clary, but something was different about Johanna, he didn't want to lash out at her, or lie to her, somehow he knew she would see right through it, maybe because she was part angel, he didn't know but a part of him took comfort in her presence, and that oddly made him want to open up, even if he had only known her for a day.

"Oh." She muttered, taking his silence has confirmation. "I didn't know, I-you had said there was someone named Magnus in your life."

Alec let out a sigh as he handed her one of the newly runed arrows.

"Being…'different' in the shadowhunter world isn't exactly a walk through the park. The Clave is an old order, with old and outdated rules, and plus-"

"Jace has feelings for Clary." Johanna answered, notching the arrow and taking aim at the nearby target. "What about Magnus?"

Alec gently raised her elbows into place, and kicked her foot, making her move them further apart.

"He understands my dilemma with Jace, and I…like…him…a lot it's just-"

"Clave law." Johanna finished, glancing over her shoulder at Alec. She could finally see now who Alec really was, he was trapped, torn between duty to his family and to himself. Alec wasn't anywhere near the cold and indifferent façade he put on, he loved, deeply, but kept it bottled away for the sake of his family. Johanna could see now why Alec was so adamant about keeping his promise to Emmanuel, Alec was loyal, and would do anything to keep those he cared about safe, even if they didn't want it.

" _ **A true Nephilim, pure at heart and intention."**_

Ithuriel's words made Johanna smile.

"What?" Alec questioned, and then realized what was happening. "The angel, he spoke to you. What, does he think I'm some sort of abomination?"

"The complete opposite really," Johanna smirked, letting go of the arrow, and watching as it hit its mark right below the center of the target.

"He likes you. He thinks you are a true Nephilim, and also I guess I really am good with a bow." She boasted.

"Johanna." Alec snapped.

"I know, I know, I talk too much." She replied, rolling her eyes.

"No, Johanna your nose, it's bleeding."

"Wha-" Johanna touched her fingers to her nose, only for them to come back full of blood.

" _ **You're getting weaker."**_

"And a little dizzy." Johanna replied a loud to the angel, as the room began to spin around her.

"Johanna!" Alec yelled, grabbing her limp body just in time before she hit the ground.

 **Oh no not again! Poor Johanna, Ithuriel's power is making her weaker and weaker as time goes on! What ever will they do? :O Haha, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, I wanted the two to get a tad bit closer to one another and open up just a bit! Well, until next time!**


	7. Chapter 7

**I'm so sorry it took so long to get this chapter up guys! :( I had some technical difficulties and ended up having to rewrite the whole chapter! :O So sorry if it's not the best! Also, I know I keep saying it but you guys are just the best ever and I love you guys so much! 3 3 Thank you guys so much for all the love and support for this story! Now enjoy!**

"Johanna?" Alec called to the unconscious girl. "Johanna can you hear me?"

Johanna grumbled as she tried to open her eyes.

"Well she's not dead, that's a good thing right?" A strange voice asked.

"Where am I?" Johanna asked groggily.

"The infirmary." Alec answered. "Isabelle and Magnus are here." He warned, willing her not to speak of her angelic predicament.

"The Magnus?" Johanna asked hoarsely.

"I think she's a bit delusional as well." Alec growled.

"You're delusional." Johanna retorted, trying to no avail to prop herself onto her elbows.

"Maybe it was just wishful thinking." Alec mumbled.

"Jeesh what are you guys, 12?" Isabelle asked rolling her eyes.

It was then that Johanna finally noticed Magnus, standing silently as the two shadowhunters quarreled with one another. She could see why Alec liked him, at least from a physical stand point. The guy was stunning, albeit a bit feminine looking. His eyes were what caught Johanna's attention first, golden, almost like Ithuriel's, not as vibrant but just as beautiful, like a cat's, with specks of green that almost made them sparkle. His skin was brown, but like the color of caramel, soft and even, giving Johanna the impression he was of Asian descent.

"Well she looks fine to me." Magnus finally spoke. "You do realize I am the high warlock of Brooklyn right? Not a doctor and I usually don't make house calls, at least not any you all can afford."

"I'm sorry," Isabelle began. "I didn't know what else to do, she was bleeding everywhere and unconscious when Alec brought her in here and I just panicked."

Johanna could feel her stomach forming knots once again, causing a shooting pain to radiate throughout her body, and she knew she was going to be sick. Quickly she heaved herself over the bedside, making it just in time.

Johanna stared down at the pool of blood on the floor as she wiped the rest off her mouth. This is bad, she thought. Really bad.

" _ **It's finally happening."**_ Ithuriel spoke solemnly. _**"Your body is becoming too weak to contain me. I'm afraid there's not much time left."**_

Great. Johanna replied silently.

"That doesn't look fine to me!" Isabelle gasped, running over to Johanna's bedside and gently rubbing her back.

Magnus pursed his lips for a moment, taking in the siblings' worried faces.

"Fine, I'll see what I can do." He finally replied.

"Isabelle, go find Jace, tell him what's happening." Alec ordered.

"But I-"

"Just go Izzy, please."

Isabelle frowned at her brother for a moment as if she were going to retort, but instead gave Johanna one last rub on the back, and walked out of the room begrudgingly.

"Johanna." Alec said gently, taking a seat on the bed next to her. "I know what's happening, and Magnus, he may be able to help."

The pain in Johanna's stomach had now made its way to her head, throbbing so uncontrollably, it was hard to make out anything Ithuriel may have been saying to her.

"What's going on here?" Magnus asked.

"Do you trust me?" Alec asked, ignoring Magnus' question. "Do you trust me that I trust him?"

The pain became so unbearable for Johanna, making it too difficult for her to overthink this. She barely knew, well actually, didn't know this Magnus at all, but she trusted Alec, and if Alec trusted him, then so would she, end of story.

"Yes." She managed to say.

Alec jumped up from the bed to face Magnus, what was he supposed to say? Where would he even begin?

"She's an angel." Alec said, deciding to go with short and sweet.

"Well if you say so, I on the other hand would have to get to know her a little better before-"

"An actual angel Magnus." Alec sighed, rolling his eyes.

"You're kidding right?" Magnus smiled slyly.

"Do you think I would kid under these circumstances?" Alec replied, his face hard as stone.

"And you expect me to believe that?"

"Yes! I expect you to believe that, I expect you to believe me. I wouldn't lie to you."

Magnus studied Alec's face for a moment before saying, "Fine, what do I need to do? What's happening to her?"

"The angel's name is Ithuriel, Johanna isn't really him, she's a vessel or something, but they're bound together, and he's beginning to weaken her."

Magnus' gaze fell on Johanna, who was now curled into a small ball a top the bed, her head clasped tightly in her hands. Slowly he walked up to the bed and hovered his hand hesitantly over her.

"There's so much power radiating off her." Magnus mumbled to himself, his hand beginning to shake nervously as he gently placed it onto Johanna's head.

As soon as the contact was made Magnus could feel the rush of energy explode throughout his body causing him to let out a sharp gasp. Suddenly memories began to flash into his mind, memories that were not his own, but that of the girl's. He could see her as a small girl, scared and alone, could see as she descended down the steps of the dark passageway. He could feel her heart beating rapidly, fear consuming every part of her small body.

And then Magnus saw him. He was bound in a circle of runes, beaten and broken, and so thin it seemed almost impossible, yet still so beautiful. His heart tightened in his chest as an overwhelming sadness enveloped him, and felt as the tears began streaming down the young girls face.

" _ **Leave now."**_ _The angel spoke to her._ _ **"Leave now child before he finds you here."**_

" _No." The girl sobbed in return. "You are too beautiful to be trapped here in the darkness."_

 _The girl reached out and gently placed her small hand upon the angel's disfigured face._

" _Let me help you." She whispered._

Magnus was suddenly pulled back to the present, sadness still aching in his heart. Never had he seen something so incredible in his life. The girl had thought the angel to be beautiful, yet Magnus saw the true beauty was within the girl, so innocent, so pure. Magnus had lived for quite a long time but never had he seen such beauty packed within such a small child. How could a girl so small know the meaning of such sacrifice? The questions swirled relentlessly through his head.

Suddenly Magnus realized the tears that he had felt running down his face wasn't just the girl's but also his own.

"Magnus?" Alec questioned. "Are you okay? Can you do it?"

Magnus wiped the tears roughly from his face and tried to push whatever emotions the angel stirred within him away in order to concentrate on the task at hand. Without answering Alec's question, Magnus placed a shaky hand a top the girl once again, hoping this time another freaky, angelic vision wouldn't invade his mind, and it didn't, the angel must have wanted Magnus to see the truth, and now, he must want him to save the girl just as bad as Alec did, which if he was being totally honest with himself did incite a twinge of jealousy knowing that Alec cared enough about the girl to be so frantic about her health, but that was just utterly ridiculous thinking, especially at a time like this.

Pushing away the distracting thoughts once again, Magnus conjured up his healing spell with as much power as possible, and watched as it coursed through every limb of Johanna's body.

Johanna's breathing grew quieter as the pain slowly began to subside. Finally able to remove her hands from her once throbbing head, Johanna let out a long sigh of relief.

"You did it." She exhaled.

"Don't count your blessings just yet my dear." Said Magnus.

"What do you mean?" Alec asked, crossing his arms over his taut leather jacket. "She looks healed to me."

"I merely cured the symptoms, not the problem I'm afraid."

Alec shot Johanna a worried look as he took in Magnus' words, which Johanna returned with a dumb, lopsided smile, that reminded Magnus of a face Jace had probably made once or twice.

"What do we do then?" Alec asked, returning his gaze back to Magnus.

" _I_ will go back to my place and try to find whatever I can on this, you," He said, turning to Johanna. "Try to take it easy."

"Alec, Johanna!" Jace called as he burst through the infirmary door with Clary and Isabelle not far behind.

"About time." Alec mumbled.

"Hey you." Jace said, walking up to Johanna's bedside. "How you feeling?"

"Feeling great, thanks to Magnus." She said, throwing a brilliant smile in Magnus' direction.

Jace shot Alec a nervous glare which Alec returned with a reassuring nod.

"Well, if you'll excuse me I think my work here is done." Magnus said as he began to take his leave.

"I'll uh, walk you out." Alec called, jogging in behind him as he exited the room.

"I think I'm aware of all of the exits." Magnus smiled wryly.

"I-uh-I wanted the thank you, for helping us." Said Alec as he stuffed his hands into his pocket.

The twinge of jealousy that Magnus felt earlier managed to wriggle its way back into his chest. Help 'us'? He thought. Of course he knew he was being tremendously absurd and he was much too old for such petty jealousy, but something about the way Alec protected the girl, the way he looked at her, gave Magnus a feeling he hadn't felt in centuries.

"And here I was thinking I had only helped the girl." He said, not able to contain the harsh feelings that had managed to somehow consume him.

"Excuse me?" Alec said. Magnus could see the confusion evident in his beautiful face, just looking into those piercing blue eyes was enough to make Magnus melt, but the other part of him wanted to make Alec break, make him admit whatever feelings were beginning to blossom for his angel girl.

"Well, you said thanks for helping 'us', and I just wasn't aware you two came in a package."

"We don't." Alec said coolly.

"I'm just going to cut to the chase here Alec, you care for her."

Alec scoffed. "What are you talking about Magnus? Where is this even coming from, that I asked you to save her?"

"I just want you to admit it to me."

"Of course I care about her, she's my friend." Alec almost chocked out the last word. If Johanna would have heard him say that she was his friend, he didn't know if she'd ever let him live it down.

Magnus gave him a small smile as he cupped Alec's face gently into his hand. "They say that love is blind, and that may be true, but an even truer statement is sometimes, we are blind to love."

And with that, made his way down the long corridor to make his exit.

"Magnus!" Alec called. "Magnus wait!"

"Don't worry." Magnus called back, "Her secret is safe with me."

And then he was gone, leaving Alec confused, and a tad bit hurt, standing in the dark hallway alone.

* * *

Alec lay in his bed, staring up at the ceiling with Magnus' words still swirling in his head. He didn't understand what made him think such things about himself and Johanna. Of course Alec cared about her, felt responsible for her even, but Alec felt responsible for everyone at the institute.

Not Clary. A voice rang out in his head. No, you don't feel responsible for Clary, in fact you down right despise her. He thought to himself, but that was only because of his feelings for Jace and nothing more. Or was it? The voice questioned again. Here you are, without those feelings, supposedly, and yet, you still don't like her.

It's because she's reckless, headstrong, and terrible at following the rules, yet, so is Johanna, they are sisters. So why are you partial to Johanna? He thought. Could Magnus be right? Could Alec be developing feelings for her? No. No Magnus can't be right. He's never had feelings for a girl in his life, and besides, he liked Magnus, he wanted to be with Magnus.

Suddenly a knock came at the door and he instantly knew who it was. It was finally clear to Alec how creepy it was that he was able to sense her presence. Alec momentarily contemplated not answering. With everything that Magnus had planted in his head today, he wasn't sure if he could even face Johanna. But was it fear of acting strange in front of her, or fear of what he might feel if he did see her?

"Alec." Her voice came from behind the door, so softly that he wasn't sure he even heard anything.

Letting out a long whistled sigh, he pulled himself off of his bed and made his way sluggishly to the door.

"What is it?" He asked opening the door, causing Johanna to jump slightly from her crouched position.

"Were you trying to look through my keyhole?" Alec asked, surprised.

"No." She retorted quickly. "Why would I do that? That would be weird."

Alec rolled his eyes. "What are you doing here, other than spying on me?"

Johanna scratched her head nervously. "I-um, couldn't sleep." She finally replied.

"And that's my problem why?" Alec replied dryly.

"It's not, but, I mean you weren't asleep either so I just thought-"

"And how exactly could you have known that?" Alec questioned suspiciously.

"Because,"

"Because you were spying."

"Because Ithuriel told me!" She sighed.

"That seems like an unfair advantage." Alec said, furrowing his brow.

"It is what it is." Johanna smiled, pushing herself into his room.

"So," She said taking a seat in the plush leather chair near Alec's bed. "Why can't you sleep?"

Alec let out a long defeated sigh before shutting the door and returning to his spot on the bed.

"Right now you." He huffed.

"Oh ha ha, just answer the question." She pried.

Alec sighed. "It's Magnus, something he said."

"What did he say?" Johanna insisted, resting her chin on her knees as she looked on expectantly.

"He-he thinks I have feelings for…for…" The last words wouldn't come out he realized as he stared blanklessly at the same spot in the ceiling as earlier.

"For Jace?" She finished.

"Sure, yeah, for Jace." He decided to say.

"Well don't you?" She asked, remembering their earlier conversation.

Alec contemplated her words for a moment, of course she didn't really know that they were actually talking about her, and not Jace but still he had no idea how to answer her.

"I thought I didn't, since Magnus came along he's all I've ever thought about but then today he mentioned it, he was so persistent about it."

"I hate to say it but, if you really didn't have feelings for Jace anymore, then it wouldn't be bothering you so much."

Anger bubbled up in Alec's stomach because he knew her words were true, but he hated it, he hated that her words were true because that meant he really didn't know who he was. He had been so confused for so long, so tormented by the fears of not knowing who he truly was inside, Jace had been the very first person he had developed feelings for, and that made it that much worse. How was he to know those feelings were real when he couldn't act on them out of fear, fear of losing his friend and fear of losing his family. He knew Clave law, he knew what they thought about people like him, so he tried to fight it, tried to fight who he thought he was for so long that he just became even more lost.

Years of self-hatred, not able to look at himself in the mirror, and then Magnus came along and taught him that it was okay to be different, that being different didn't mean you were a monster, finally got him to accept himself for what he was, gay, a word that Alec chocked on so many times before, and now, now all of a sudden she comes along and throws all of Alec's progress out the window. He's back at square one again, just like he was when he was in love with Jace, terrified, confused, and most of all angry, angry at her, angry at the world, and most of all angry at himself for being so screwed up in the first place.

"Just get out." He managed to say, in the least hostile tone he could manage, because as angry as he was at the moment he still didn't want to hurt her, which made him even more angry.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Please Johanna, just go." Alec said, clenching his jaw.

"Alec what's wrong?" She questioned, concern evident in her deep blue eyes.

"Johanna!" Alec finally snapped. "I'm tired, and I've had enough of you today already, so will you please just leave and let me sleep!"

"Oh." She said hoarsely, causing Alec to glance in her direction, which he regretted as soon as his eyes met hers. She was hurt obviously. Tears were beginning to form in her eyes, causing them to ripple like the tides of the ocean. Her hands were knotted into fists at her side, and her face was flushed, something Jace's face would do when Alec scolded him, meaning she was hurt and angry, even if she was trying to hide how hurt she really was, which made Alec feel instantly guilty.

"Sorry, I keep forgetting how we aren't friends." She finally said, making her way to his door.

Alec didn't say a word as the door slammed behind her. He knew he had hurt her, even if he didn't want too. She wasn't the person he hated, it was himself he hated, and it seemed the only way to hurt himself was to hurt the people he cared about. It was for their own good anyway.


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm so sorry it has taken so long to update! Please don't hate me :'( Thank you everyone who has continued to read and comment and like and just show me so much love, even though I'm terrible and haven't updated in forever! You guys are awesome and I hope you continue to enjoy the story! 3**

Johanna tapped her fingers on the window ceil lightly as she watched the rain trickle down in small crystals onto the glass. The pain was beginning to creep back slowly into her skull but she was starting to get used to it. She also hadn't gotten much sleep in between her fight with Alec, and Jace bursting into her room not long after, to call her into the library to device battle plans for whatever scheme he had concocted up again, in order to save Clary's mom, or rather, _their_ mom, but Johanna wasn't quite ready for that yet, for now, she was just Clary's mom.

Johanna gave a quick glance over at a very unhappy Alec seated on the couch next to his sister, Isabelle. It was clear he hadn't gotten much sleep either, hopefully the guilt of being such an asshat to her had kept him up. She had hoped he would have at least tried to apologize by now, because even though she still held some sort of resentment from earlier, she seemed to feel tremendously out of place around here without Alec helping her out, but she was too prideful to be the bigger person and approach him, living with a pack of egotistical werewolves will do that to you. Jace wasn't helping either, waking everyone up in the middle of the night to go on another dangerous and reckless mission, as Alec had put it. Johanna was game of course, but only because Alec had disapproved of it, which got her a very disdainful glare from him. She wasn't going to lie, a part of her actually felt accomplished. Does that make her a bad person? She thought to herself.

 _ **That, and a terrible friend.**_ Ithuriel spoke up.

" _Hey, whose side are you on?"_ She silently snapped back.

"Ok, Simon said he'll do it." Clary said excitedly, pushing her fiery hair from her eyes.

"Great." Alec replied sarcastically, earning a sharp jab in the ribs from his sister.

"Let's get geared up and meet at the elevator in ten." Jace added, ignoring Alec's comment.

Everyone gave their affirmations and began to exit the room.

Johanna made her way sluggishly down the hallway, hopefully the adrenaline of the mission would wake her up because at the moment, she was feeling like a bag of bricks.

"Johanna." A familiar voice came from behind her as she reached her door. Alec stopped an oddly far distance from her with his hands stuffed into his pajama pockets. Had he finally come to make things right? She thought wishfully.

"Yeah?" She said flatly, not wanting to show the relief that she was feeling.

"I don't think you should come." He stated, draining every ounce of relief from her body. So much for wishful thinking. She thought.

"Let me guess, I'll just get in your way?" She said, rolling her eyes.

Alec made a pained face, as if Johanna's assumption had hurt him somehow.

"Anything could happen that could reveal what you are, not only to the others, but to the enemy. It could get back to Valentine and then…"

"And then what?" She snapped sharply. "Take me? Wouldn't that just make you happy?"

Johanna had expected some long angry reply, ending in Alec stomping away dramatically to his room, but instead he let out a long defeated sigh.

"I know what you're doing." He replied. "You're not the only one around here who does stupid stuff just to get back at me." Alec smiled a small knowing smile.

"Right, I forget you're the only one around here who makes rational decisions." She barked back.

"Look, just…Please don't put yourself in danger just because you're mad at me." He said oddly cool.

"I'm not putting myself in danger to make you angry." She scoffed. "I'm doing it because it's the right thing to do."

 _ **Dishonesty is not a very nice trait Johanna.**_ Ithuriel scolded.

" _Shuuushhhh."_ She growled subconsciously.

"But you know, if you really wanted to help me, you'd stop being such a jerk, and help me make sure that doesn't happen."

Alec stared intensely into her eyes for a moment, seemingly contemplating her words. Johanna had forgotten how piercing blue his eyes were, sharp and cold, almost like the color of ice. She could see how they could be beautiful when they weren't being used to stare through your soul with spine shivering intimidation. She wondered how they looked to Magnus, if Alec cared about him as much as he said he did, than she was sure he had seen them in a different light.

"Fine." He finally said with a sigh. "Get ready and meet me in my room, we will see how the runes affect you before we meet up with the others."

"Ok." Johanna said, sounding more surprised than she would have liked before disappearing behind her door.

Alec put on his last piece of gear, carefully strapping the leather bracer onto his arm, securing it tightly. He had run to the armory to grab his quiver and bow, as well as the one he had given Johanna yesterday. He still felt guilty by the way he had snapped at her earlier, but maybe helping her on her first mission would help him get back into her good graces. It still bothered him how much he actually cared that he was in her good graces, but what didn't lately? He had finally decided last night to not let those things get to him so much, maybe he was overreacting, who knows, but he really didn't need to think about all that right now.

Suddenly a small tap came at the door.

"Come in." He called, and Johanna's head popped slowly into the doorway.

"You're not going to throw me out again are you?" She asked.

"No." Alec sighed, "Just come in and shut the door."

Johanna complied, doing what he had said. He had to admit, she did look the shadowhunter part. Her dark wavy hair faded smoothly into the black top she was wearing, and her jeans, of the same color, hugged her body nicely, showing off the slight curve of her hips.

"Alec?" She questioned, breaking him from his thoughts. "We going to do this or what?"

"Right." He said, grabbing his stele. "We will start with the healing iratze, its simple and small, but, we will have to do it somewhere you can conceal it just in case you have some sort of reaction to it."

Johanna furrowed her brow in contemplation. It had become easy for Alec to tell when she was talking to the angel.

"What is he saying?" Alec asked.

Johanna shook her head as if to jiggle the angel out.

"He's not certain what they could do either." She replied nervously.

"Well," Alec said, lifting his stele. "I guess there is only one way to find out."

Johanna sighed, lifting the edge of her shirt uneasily.

Alec noticed the small paw print below her naval, I sign most likely of the loyalty she had for her werewolf family. The memory of Emmanuel dangling from the arch demon's grasp, flashed through Alec's mind. He had almost forgotten. It made him feel all that much guiltier for the way he treated her earlier. She had lost someone important to her, someone who had taken her in, and treated her as one of his own, even though it was against werewolf law. She loved him, was devoted to him, he was her true father, and now he was gone, and she was thrust into this world not knowing what was ahead of her, and for some reason, she had risked her life for him, weakened herself to make sure he got to come back to his family. She saw him as someone she could rely on, someone she could trust, and he treated her like utter crap just to prove a point to himself.

Somehow Johanna reminded him of Jace, strong, loyal, and dedicated. Maybe that's why he found himself so attracted to her. Sure, there were other female shadowhunters with those qualities, he knew more badass female shadowhunters than he knew males, but something was different about Johanna, something drew him to her way more than he'd ever been drawn to a girl before and it bothered him. Of course she was beautiful, but Alec was never a sucker for outside beauty like Jace was.

"Any day now." Johanna said, pulling him from his thoughts. Alec felt his face burn a bright red as his hand hovered lightly over the bare skin of her hip.

"Right." He replied quietly as he began to draw the curving lines of the rune. Johanna gritted her teeth, as Alec slid the stele over her skin carefully.

"It might sting a bit." He said, taking in her pained features.

"Thanks for the heads up." She growled sarcastically through her clenched teeth.

"There." Alec said, taking a step back to admire his handy work.

Johanna looked down at the dark swirling lines.

"What now?" She asked, although Alec wasn't sure if she was speaking to him or Ithuriel.

"We wait." He finally decided to say, as he carefully began to place freshly runed arrows into his quiver.

"Here." He said, handing Johanna the bow and quiver he had gotten for her earlier.

Johanna took it, examining the ornate designs carved into the shaft of the bow.

"Do you think I can do it?" She asked, throwing the quiver onto her shoulder.

Alec let out a small laugh.

"You killed an archdemon, I think you can handle a few forsaken."

"This is different." She sighed. "I was fighting for our lives, for…for his life, what if I can't do it now?"

Alec contemplated for a moment. He could hear the fear and uncertainty in her voice as she nibbled her bottom lip nervously.

"You're going to do just fine." He smiled reassuringly.

Johanna looked at him oddly, as if he hadn't made any sense.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" She asked. "Are you sick or something? Should I be concerned?"

Alec rolled his eyes, "You know I did feel sort of guilty about last night, but now I'm starting to remember why."

"Oh," Johanna said, her eyes wide in mock surprise. "I'm sorry, was that you trying to apologizing, because if it is, then I totally missed the "I'm sorry" part."

"You're unpleasable." Alec muttered.

"Aaaand you're an ass, but, I guess neither of us can help what we are, can we?" Alec was uncertain if she was joking with him or not, it was hard to tell by the smug look on her face, but then again, she had a good poker face.

"Let's just check your rune already so we can get this over with." He sighed, lifting the edge of her shirt carefully to reveal the dark curves of the healing rune.

"Seems to be reacting just fine." He said, pulling out his stele and running it over the rune to activate it. The healing iratze glowed a deep red, then faded shortly afterwards, with no wound present to heal.

"Looks like it's going to be just fine."

"Dang," Johanna sighed sarcastically. "And here I was hoping they'd light me up like a Christmas tree."

Alec gave her a smug look, before the sound of the door creaking open startled him.

"Alec are you…" Isabelle stopped as she saw the scene before her. "I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?" She said, a small smile creeping onto her face.

Alec dropped the edge of Johanna's shirt like it was on fire, and quickly stumbled back onto his feet.

"No," He said coolly. "I was just helping Johanna with her runes."

"Right, well Simon is here, so we are heading out now."

"Yeah, be right there." He said, grabbing his bow, and throwing the quiver over his shoulder. "Let's get this over with." He mumbled to Johanna, getting a knowing nod in return as they quickly followed Isabelle down the hall.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys! Here's another chapter! It is my adaptation of them retrieving the cup. Some parts of the fight scene were pulled directly from the book with changes here and there to fit my story, the fight scene was just so perfect in the book I didn't want to change much about it…So here it is! Enjoy!**

The ride there was very uncomfortable for Johanna. She could sense the growing tension between Jace, Clary and the mundane Simon. It was clear that something had happened to make the boy upset, and Johanna could more than likely guess what that something was. A smile crept onto Johanna's face. She liked Jace, he reminded her of her brother Oliver, pig headed and egotistical, yet able to use his wit and humor to win people over. It was an odd feeling, but it made Johanna feel more comfortable and at home, unlike the constant back and forth banter between her and Alec.

She didn't know what was wrong with him, she tried so hard to prove herself to him, but somehow she always knew the wrong things to say. It was exhausting really, but she understood why he was so closed off and reserved, the struggle of being gay in a society that looks down on such things had to be hard, she could tell it grated on him, made him angry and self-conscious, and she felt terrible that he had to go through such things, but that didn't make any less frustrating.

"We're here." Simon muttered.

"Thank you Simon." Clary smiled, pulling him into a hug. "We'll be back soon."

"Wait," The boy said, "I can't come with you guys?"

"No." Jace said dryly.

"Why not?" Simon retorted angrily.

"Because, whose going to be here if something goes wrong? What if the car gets towed?" Jace retaliated.

Simon let out a sigh.

"Fine." He huffed, turning back around in his seat and slapping both of his hands back onto the wheel. "I'll just wait here, like a good _mundy_ "

"You're learning!" Jace said in mock astonishment, earning a hard glare from Clary.

"Can we just go now?" Alec interrupted, already exiting the van and adjusting his bow.

For once Johanna agreed with him, all of this drama was making her headache much worse.

They all walked cautiously up the sidewalk to the witch's house. The night sky was dark and empty, taken over by the rain clouds that had rolled in. The only light they had was Jace's witch light, which gave an eerie glow around them through the fog and mist from the rain.

Clary stopped at the door and gave a firm knock once or twice before it slung open, spilling a bright golden light into the dense night.

"Clary!" the witch gasped, pulling her into a tight hug that brought Clary inches off of the ground. "The last time a saw you, you had disappeared through the portal! Where did you go?"

"Williamsburg." Clary answered, still trying to catch her breath.

"Well who said there wasn't any good transportation around here?" Dorothea laughed. "Come in, come in." She finally said, swinging open the door to let them all in.

Johanna took a look around as she entered the room. There wasn't much organization to it all, things were scattered here and there, except for the stack of tarot cards stacked neatly next to a crystal ball on the table.

Johanna's gut turned a bit.

" _ **Something is off here."**_ Ithuriel spoke.

" _I know, I can feel it."_ Johanna replied silently, cautiously taking a look around.

" _ **Stay alert."**_ He replied.

"Here it is!" She heard Clary say, picking a card from the deck that had been placed on the table. "Jace give me your stele."

Jace placed it firmly into her hand. Clary gripped it tightly as she traced the small runes on the back of the card.

The dreadful feeling in Johanna's stomach was now in her throat as she watched Clary reach her hand into the card, and pull out the Cup. Johanna gave Alec a nervous glance, whose eyes were fixated in awe at the sight before him.

"Somehow I thought it be bigger." Jace said, breaking the silence.

"It's a perfectly nice size," Clary replied crossly, examined the cup in her hand.

"Yeah, I know but I was just thinking like…you know." He gestured his hands out widely in front of him.

"Geesh Jace it's the Mortal Cup, not the mortal toilet bowl." Isabelle spoke up, rolling her eyes. "Are we done now? Can we go?"

Johanna stepped closer to Alec, whose gaze was still fixed on Clary and the Cup.

"Alec." She whispered. "Somethings off here."

"What do you mean?" He whispered back, his face snapping to look at her. "Jace scanned the place, and the levels of demonic activity were low."

"I don't know." She sighed. "but I can feel it."

Johanna quickly turned her attention back to Clary when she heard her snap, "No!"

The witch was on her feet now, her long red nails reaching out for the Cup. Alec gave Johanna a sideways look.

"Okay, okay." The witch said, walking over the wall and placing her hands onto the curtains. "Would you like to take the portal?"

"Don't do that!" Johanna hissed, causing the witch to give her an eerie grin as she ripped the curtains from their rods, sending them crashing to the floor. The portal swirled with violent red clouds from behind them, and a dark shape wisped from within it, making its way slowly to Madam Dorothea, and enveloping her body.

To Johanna's horror it began seeping into her, filling every crevice. The witch screamed a chilling, gurgling scream as her body began to snap and distort. The sound of bones cracking filled the air, reminding Johanna of the monstrous demon that had murdered Emmanuel.

"No." She croaked out hoarsely, as it began to take its form.

Alec grabbed her arm. "We have to go, now!" He shouted for everyone to hear. The five of them raced through the foyer to the front door, where Isabelle jiggled the knob violently.

"It won't open, it must be sealed with magic!"

"What is that?" Clary gasped, as the demon creeped slowly behind them. It was nowhere near a human image now, instead it was almost like the other one, like skin draped over bone, except it towered over them, almost nine feet tall, with black bones protruding from oozing openings all over its body.

"It's an arch demon." Jace said, a small quiver evident in his voice.

"Give me the Cup, and I'll let you live." The demon's voice rang like an eerie echo.

"Not a chance in hell." Jace growled, drawing his sword and flinging himself at the demon.

Jace whipped his blades up and outward with an almost frightening speed, both sank into the fleshiest part of the demon, its abdomen. It howled and struck at him, knocking him aside the way a cat might bat aside a kitten. Jace rolled and got to his feet, but Johanna could tell it had taken a lot out of him.

Isabelle was next, darting forward she lashed out at the demon with her whip. It struck the demon's gray hide, and a red weal appeared, welling blood. The demon chuckled a low unearthly noise, and without any reprieve, moved toward Jace.

With his uninjured hand Jace drew out a second seraph blade. He whispered to it and it sprung free, bright and gleaming. He raised it as the demon loomed up before him and grinned even as the demon reached for him. Isabelle, screaming, lashed at it, sending blood in a thick spray across the floor.

The demon struck, its razored hand lashing down at Jace. Jace staggered back, but he was unharmed. Something had thrown itself between him and the demon, a slim black shadow with a gleaming blade in its hand. Alec. The demon shrieked as Alec's blade pierced its skin. With a snarl it struck again, bone-talons catching Alec a vicious blow that lifted him off his feet. Johanna looked on horrified as the demon hurled him against the far wall. He struck with a sickening crunch and slid to the floor.

"Alec!" Johanna cried out. He didn't move. "No!" She screamed again, rushing as quickly as she could to his side.

Isabelle screamed her brother's name, making an inhuman like snarl as she charged at the demon. The demon, turning, caught her a backhanded blow that sent her spinning to the ground. Coughing blood, Isabelle started to get to her feet; the demon knocked her down again, and this time she lay still.

Johanna fell to her knees next to Alec's motionless body, and pulled his bloodied head into her lap. She could feel his heart beating faintly underneath her skin and she let out a sigh of relief.

" _ **I'm not certain your body could handle healing him again."**_ Ithuriel said solemnly.

"I don't care." She growled aloud, anger rising in her chest. "I don't care what it does to me, you're going to save him Ithuriel, you're going to save him, and you're going to kill this damn demon, I want it in ashes."

Johanna took one last glance at Alec's unmoving features, and gently brushed the dark tendrils of hair from his face, before softly lying him back down onto the floor, and rising boldly to her feet.

"Hey you ugly piece of garbage!" She yelled, as the demon moved slowly towards Clary. "Why don't you try your luck at me instead?"

The demon let out an eerie chuckle as it turned to stare at her.

"As you wish." It gurgled in its haunting voice as it began to move towards her.

"Johanna no!" Jace called out from the stairwell as he clutched Clary firmly.

Johanna ignored him, and closed her eyes tightly.

"You know what to do Ithuriel." She growled through clenched teeth.

" _ **Child."**_ Ithuriel pleaded, which was a very odd thing to hear for Johanna, but she dismissed him.

"Do it!"

Without any more hesitation Ithuriel pushed himself forth with such force that it almost knocked Johanna off her feet. Clary, Isabelle, and Jace watched on in disbelief as the angel opened his eyes, spilling heavenly light throughout the room, and letting out a frequency so high and shrill, it made the demon stagger backwards.

" _It is time to go back from which you came demon!"_ Ithuriel's voice echoed fiercely throughout the room.

"Angel." The demon said, sounded startled. "This isn't possible."

" _We shall see."_ Ithuriel spat, as silhouettes of feathered wings burst from Johanna's back. Ithuriel thrust himself in the air, letting out a screech as blinding light erupted from his chest, filling the room, and shrouding the demon in heavenly fire. The demon screeched a terrible gurgling shriek as it singed the flesh from its bone.

The three shadowhunters gasped in unison as the demon burst into ashes that filled the room in a dusty fog.

"Johanna!" Jace called, frantically rushing to her side as her limp body hit the ground with a thud.

"What…what was that Jace?" Isabelle said, pulling herself up from the floor. "What the hell is she?"

Jace stared at the unconscious girl before him. He had never seen anything like that before, it had to be one of the most incredible things he had ever seen in his life.

"She's an angel." He smiled.


	10. Chapter 10

Johanna awoke to voices all around her, all familiar and much alive, which Johanna thought for sure that she would not be after taking out that demon. Demon. She thought with a panic. Alec.

Johanna arose with a start from the bed in the infirmary to see Jace and Magnus staring intensely back at her.

"Alec?" She cried hoarsely, frantically searching the room, to find him laying peacefully in a bed right next to hers.

"Alec." She said again, this time with a bit more relief, ignoring the pain radiating throughout her body as she tried to make her way towards him.

"Hold it right there angel-face!" Magnus said, grabbing her and pushing her forcefully back into her pillow. "You have no strength to even be walking right now, let alone continue indulging your hero complex. I honestly don't know how you're even still alive, but then again I do take some credit for that." He smiled wryly.

"Alec," She panted, trying to ignore the growing pain in her head. "He's hurt."

"And he'll live, again, thanks to moi. You aren't the only one around here with powers you know, and might I say, I usually don't throw myself into a coma every time I use them."

"How are you feeling?" Jace added taking a seat next to her.

"The usual." She sighed taking another glimpse towards Alec. She had thought he was dead. She could still hear the sound his body made as it hit the wall, causing a cold shiver to radiate down her spine.

She had never hated anything so much before she had met a demon, all she could see at that moment was Emmanuel dangling in its grasp, she couldn't let it happen again, and when she saw Alec, bloodied and broken lying motionless on the floor, something snapped within her.

Tears began to sting her eyes as the thought of losing Alec too crossed her mind. She didn't know when she had come to care so much about him through all of the harshness between the two of them, but she did, and she couldn't imagine trying to adapt this life of a shadowhunter without him.

"Hey." Jace said, gently placing a comforting hand onto her shoulder. "You did good." He smiled.

"Clary, Isabelle." She managed to choke out.

"Their fine too. Just some bumps and bruises, nothing a healing iratze couldn't fix." Jace reassured her.

Johanna let out a relieved sigh. "They know now, don't they?"

"Yeah."

"They probably think I'm some monster." She said gravely.

"No, they don't, they accept you, just as much as they had before."

Johanna let out a light cough that didn't seem to stop, and soon she was doubled over trying to gasp for just a morsel of air.

"Johanna!" Jace gasped, as the bright red blood began spurting out of her mouth and nose.

"I…I…" She tried saying through the violent heaving of her chest.

Magnus let out a deep sigh and slapped her back forcefully, causing Johanna to cough up the remaining blood that had blocked her passageways.

Johanna heaved in a shaky breath, gulping in the air greedily. Jace gave Magnus a quick glare as he continued to rub her back comfortingly.

"About that." Magnus spoke, as if the sight before him hadn't quite affected him. "I managed to find something about your…predicament, however I'm afraid that it wasn't quite what you were looking for."

"Anything is what I'm looking for." Johanna said hoarsely, wiping the remaining blood from her face.

"What did you find Magnus?" Jace asked impatiently.

Magnus sighed. "All I could seem to find was a temporary fix to the problem, but nothing yet on how to separate the two of you."

"I don't have much time left, Magnus, I'll take anything at this point."

"What do you have to do?" added Jace.

"I cannot do anything, it is a rite only those blessed by the angel can perform."

"Shadowhunters?" Jace asked.

"Possibly, although wasn't that specific. A human vessel, shadowhunter or not, can only withstand so much angelic power for so long. The book described Johanna's dilapidation to a tee. First come the headaches, then the nose bleeds, and then the organs begin to shutdown slowly one by one. In order for the vessel to survive, they must ease some of the strain off of their body by sharing the power with someone else." Magnus explained.

"Share the power?" Johanna asked skeptically. "And how could I possibly do that?"

"You would have to connect to someone of heavenly blood, by the same process as the first time the angel connected to you, It would have to be someone who could handle their share of the strain, someone preferably that you have connected to before."

"But I don't know how I connected with Ithuriel, it just happened, he touched my head and then…" Johanna trailed off, trying hard to remember that day, but her last memory without Ithuriel connected to her, stopped there.

"Even if this does work," Jace added, "How would the connection even work? How would it help Johanna?"

Magnus scratched the chipped black polish from his nails as if the conversation was uninteresting to him. "That person would be bound to Ithuriel as well, which means any sort of power increase would be divided between the two of them, instead of just Johanna."

"That doesn't make any sense." Jace stated dryly.

"Well that's angels for you." Magnus sighed.

"How would it affect the other person?" Johanna asked.

"As long as the bond between the two hosts is strong enough to share the angel's subconscious between the two of them, then there shouldn't be a problem."

"And what if it's not?"

"Then there is a slight possibility of that person going insane." Magnus shrugged nonchalantly.

Jace scrunched his face for a moment in deep contemplation, before saying, "I'll do it."

"Jace." Johanna said in surprise. "Are…are you sure?"

"No." Alec's voice came from his spot on the bed, drawing everyone's attention as he slowly sat himself up. "I'll do it."

Magnus let out a small scoff in disbelief. "You must be joking. You're in no shape to do anything of the sort."

"We've connected before, so I'm assuming I have a better chance." He stated flatly.

"Have you now?" Magnus questioned as shadows clouded his golden eyes.

"She's healed me Magnus." Alec rolled his eyes, wincing as he threw his feet over the side of the bed. "I would be dead if it wasn't for her, so I intend to do the same."

Alec's gaze fell onto Johanna. She looked back at him, uncertainty in her deep blue eyes.

"I…I can't let you do this." She managed to say, her eyes never leaving his.

"I'm glad you didn't have the same reservations with me." Jace replied sarcastically.

"It's not your decision to make." He said, ignoring Jace's comment.

"I think it's at least half my decision!" She replied angrily.

She didn't know why the thought of Alec sharing something so personal with her sent a wave of anxiety through her body, but it did.

" _ **Because of your feelings for him."**_ Ithuriel finally spoke.

" _That's ridiculous!"_ She spat back.

" _ **I may be an angel, but I do know the ways of human emotion, no matter how odd they may be."**_

"And what does Ithuriel have to say?" Alec asked, his head halfcocked, giving her a look that said he knew the angel was speaking.

Johanna's whole body burned bright red as her eyes came to meet his once again.

"Nothing, he….he didn't…"

Magnus made a deep throaty groan, drawing the attention away from Johanna, which she was very grateful for.

She didn't know why Ithuriel would think such things, the boy was gay for heaven's sake! And besides, he was controlling, moody, and the king of brooding, it was both physically and mentally exhausting being around him. But she somehow always found herself near him anyways, she sought out his company even when she knew it would probably end badly, and when that archdemon attacked the first person that crossed her mind, the person she feared for the most wasn't her sister Clary, it was Alec. The first person she thought of when she awoke…Alec.

Why? She pleaded with herself as the realization sank in. Why do you have feelings for someone who will never feel the same back? You're so stupid. She growled at herself. You're so stupid that you couldn't even see it until now. You're blind, naive, and stupid!

"I think I've had enough of all this." Magnus sighed once again, pulling Johanna from her mental breakdown. "So if you don't lose all your marbles trying to prove whatever it is you're trying to prove, call me." Magnus winked at Alec, and with a flip of the wrist, disappeared in a plumb of purple smoke.

Jace let out a long sigh. "I'm going to go check on Clary." He said. "You guys please try to get some rest, we will discuss all of this tomorrow, I don't think either of you guys have the strength to be arguing so much right now, I know I don't." He grumbled, giving Johanna one last pat on the shoulder before disappearing behind the door.

The room was filled with silence for an unnerving amount of time before Alec finally spoke up.

"Why don't you want me to do this?" He asked, almost sounding hurt, his piercing eyes fixated on her.

Johanna hesitated for a moment, twisting the soft fabric of her blanket nervously between her fingers.

"I just, I don't want you to have to get hurt again." She finally said.

"But you were perfectly fine with Jace?" Alec let out a small amused laugh.

"We'll yeah…It's just…"

"Please don't say you've somehow developed feelings for him too, because I honestly might vomit, that much drama might just throw me over the top." Alec smiled slightly as if to lighten the mood, but deep down there was something that felt like a twinge of fear and jealousy slowly creeping into his chest.

"God no!" She spat, disgust evident on her face. Alec didn't want to admit it but her reaction caused a wave of relief to wash through him.

Alec scooted slowly over to sit beside Johanna, taking her hand lightly into his, he didn't really know what he was doing as he pushed the small ringlet of hair from her eyes and tucked it gently behind her ear. Johanna's face flushed a bright red as his fingers ran lightly over the tender skin of her hands.

Her reaction to his sudden closeness made Alec feel somewhat accomplished. He knew she didn't understand his actions, and honestly, neither did he, he was never one for fleeting moments of comfort, especially none that were as close and personal as this, but Alec never was very good with words, so he had to show her that no matter how he may have treated her, she was someone important to him, and he would do whatever it took to make sure nothing happened to her.

"Alec." She squeaked out, her hand beginning to tremble slightly in his. It was hard to ignore the satisfaction it gave him to see her this way, it made him wonder if maybe she had begun to feel the same, but he couldn't think like that, he had Magnus, and what he felt for her wasn't fair for either of them. Alec slowly released her hand.

"Johanna, just listen for once." He said, trying to muster up the words to say. Johanna hesitated a moment before nodding her head. Her eyes had become watery, but not full of anger or sadness as they had been once before. To be honest, Alec couldn't really tell what she was thinking, and it didn't really help boost his confidence.

Alec let out a long, drawn out sigh. "Do you remember when I said you weren't my friend?" He asked. This seemed to spark a reaction out of Johanna as she pulled her brows together and squinted her eyes, letting him know she remembered quite well.

"Yeah." She huffed, causing a small smile to form onto Alec's face.

"Well it was the truth."

Johanna scoffed, pulling away from him a bit. "Wow, that didn't go where I was expecting it to."

"Would you just listen!" He groaned, causing Johanna to cross her arms across her chest impatiently.

"I said you weren't my friend because you're not, somehow you're more than that, you've become a part of my family to me, you risked your life to save mine, even though you didn't even know me, and that is more than I could ask of anyone, I don't need to ask you to prove your worth as a shadowhunter because you already have, and now it's my turn to prove the same to you."

The tears that had filled her eyes now spilled down her face like small crystals and before Alec knew what was happening, Johanna had flung herself towards him, enveloping him into a sea of soft ebony hair. This time he didn't hesitate in returning her gesture as he wrapped his arms tightly around her. Her body was soft and supple, but firm and endearing at the same time. Her hair smelled of lavender and soot, it was an odd combination but somehow Alec couldn't quite get enough of it.

The feeling of her body pressed against his own sent jolts of electricity through him, and for a split second he wondered if she had felt it too. The urge to kiss someone had never been greater as she nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck. He didn't even care that she had been getting his shirt wet again. His heart pounded fiercely in his chest and he feared if he didn't move away from her soon, he would end up losing his self-control. But he couldn't do it, the way she felt wrapped in his arms was too overpowering, and a jolt of fear surged through him.

He thought of how he once loved Jace, of the love he now felt for Magnus, any thought of any man he had even found the slightest bit attracted to, in order to drowned out these feelings for her now. But he couldn't, they were there, and he knew, to his own dismay, that they weren't going anywhere any time soon.


End file.
